The pastoral impulse to “save” marriages is strong. It is flattering and exhilirating to be a part of a resurrection story where a marriage comes back from its adulterous death. I get it. Who really wants to be the divorce attorney’s pastoral equivalent encouraging only marriage funerals? I don’t. I love miracle stories and would love to be … Continue reading “Necessary But NOT Sufficient”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal
Bruce wrote in response to a post (click here), David, I have read most, if not all, of your articles regarding the Village Church situation, browsed many of the links you shared, including the gut-wrenching one in this article of other similar stories. I also listened to Pastor Matt’s sermon on May 31 as I … Continue reading “Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal”
Sometimes You Have To Choose
Pastors, Someday You Will Have To Choose In Your Counsel Between Enabling Adultery or Encouraging Divorce. Is Your Theology Ready For That? I write this as I reflect upon the trainwreck that is The Village Church pastoral care. Here’s a post to some rather hair-raising stories of spiritual abuse (click here). My hope is that … Continue reading “Sometimes You Have To Choose”
The “Victim” Word Phobia
Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows. -Isaiah 1:17, NLT Is it just to treat victims the same way as you treat perpetrators of sins against them? God calls those in power–like pastors and church leaders–to seek justice as seen in this … Continue reading “The “Victim” Word Phobia”
When Dealing With Adultery, You Are Dealing With Evil.
When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. – I Corinthians 13:11, KJV It is past time the pastors and church leaders wake up and grow up. We live in a world … Continue reading “When Dealing With Adultery, You Are Dealing With Evil.”
“Just Want To Talk” Trojan Horse
“He wouldn’t talk to me about the real issues.” “We just wanted to talk with her.” This was a favorite Trojan Horse of my now ex-wife. It was employed with “Christian” counselors, “friends,” and family as our marriage headed to its ultimate demise. I thought about it as The Village Church debacle hit the fan … Continue reading ““Just Want To Talk” Trojan Horse”
Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and The Village Church Scandal
Today, I am making connections on influence and pastoral teaching. I am hoping to expose how a domineering and controlling pastoral teaching on divorce can infect a whole network of churches if not checked. I am going to talk about how a teaching by ex-Pastor Mark Driscoll appears suspiciously alive and active in The Village … Continue reading “Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and The Village Church Scandal”
Does God Hate Divorce More Than Adultery?
Does God hate divorce more than God hates adultery? This is a critical question to answer. This is not simply an exercise in abstract theology. The answer has real life implications. It is especially critical for those individuals who have found themselves staring down at the pieces of their own broken hearts after discovering adultery … Continue reading “Does God Hate Divorce More Than Adultery?”
Christian Janeway’s Story Exposes How Adultery Hurts Even Adult Kids
Plenty of people have told me that my father has “repented.” However, none of them heard the tender, soft, heart-felt denial of his affair that night in our family garage. None of them heard how much affection he can put into a lie. None of them had heard him swear on the Bible that he … Continue reading “Christian Janeway’s Story Exposes How Adultery Hurts Even Adult Kids”
Cheater Care
Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say…” -Genesis 3:1a, NIV Fuzzy thinking is the enemy of the spiritually imperil. Many a cheater has found themselves in sin just as Eve did because they allowed the Enemy … Continue reading “Cheater Care”