Then David said to Nathan, “I have sinned against the Lord.” Nathan replied, “The Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die. But because by doing this you have shown utter contempt for the Lord, the son born to you will die.” -2 Samuel 12:13-14, NIV Forgiveness does not wipe out all consequences for … Continue reading “King David’s Son Still Died…”
Category: Trauma of adultery
“For the kids!”
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Adulterous spouses have no shame. On one hand, they will willfully and maliciously disregard how their selfish sinful choices impact their children, and then they will invoke their names … Continue reading ““For the kids!””
Mailbag follow up
5/4/15 post continued. See original comment here. Redeemed, I’ll be blunt. It doesn’t sound like you’ve actually repented and truly owned your choices and actions. Know how I know? I’ve cheated (and it’s not worth it). I had a kid out of wedlock and was a single mom. I’ve had my fair share of big mistakes … Continue reading “Mailbag follow up”
Mailbag: “Are marriages really decimated by one person?” Um, Yeah.
“Redeemed” wrote: It’s hard to read your blog, because you seem to be very bitter still, about everything to do with your marriage and it’s ending. My husband is training to be a minister and we had been married for 9 years and in September 2014 I started to have an affair for just under … Continue reading “Mailbag: “Are marriages really decimated by one person?” Um, Yeah.”
Betrayal Ripple Effect
Experiencing the adulterous betrayal of one’s spouse is bad enough. It is soul rape, after all. That pain alone is excruciating. A sucker punch to the gut that lingers for days, weeks, months…. It feels like your spouse disemboweled you and turned your world upside down with one awful adulterous revelation (let alone all that … Continue reading “Betrayal Ripple Effect”
Job Didn’t Always Feel The Love Either…
His wife said to him, “Are you still trying to be godly when God has done all this to you? Curse him and die.” – Job 2:19, TLB This is really tempting advice to take when the bottom has fallen out of one’s life.*** *** If you have a suicide plan and means, please seek … Continue reading “Job Didn’t Always Feel The Love Either…”
That Ick Feeling
Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. – Ephesians 5:11-12, NIV When I share about this blog with others, I am sometimes met with interesting reactions. One reaction I’ve got was a “Why would you blog … Continue reading “That Ick Feeling”
Tactics In Discrediting Faithful Spouses
When I was doing my first unit of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE), I was blessed with some amazing classmates. We worked together learning about ourselves as well as how to bring quality pastoral care to those hurting at a Trauma One center in Hartford, CT. This unit took place while I was separated from my … Continue reading “Tactics In Discrediting Faithful Spouses”
Divorce As Moral Injury
While doing my year-long residency as a chaplain at a Veterans’ Affairs Medical Center, I gained education on a relatively new area of research and work for professional chaplains and psychologists working especially with combat veterans. Most people today are familiar with the acronym PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), but I would be surprised if many … Continue reading “Divorce As Moral Injury”
When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….
When divorce is treated as always unacceptable by Christian leaders… anything else is acceptable. -Lying is acceptable. -Stealing is acceptable. -Physical abuse is acceptable. -Emotional belittling and vitriolic diatribes against a spouse and the kids is acceptable. -Adultery is acceptable. In short, any sort of sin that you can imagine is acceptable. As long as the goal … Continue reading “When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….”