Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. -I Peter 4:8, NLT Marshalling Against You Some Cheaters plan out their exit with great forethought. They take advantage of extended family time–like over Thanksgiving holiday–to prepare family to be sympathetic to them during the discard. … Continue reading “Marshalling Against You”
Category: Cheating
Effort Involved
She hides and waits like a robber, eager to make more men unfaithful. -Proverbs 23:28, NLT For those inclined to believe a cheater is a victim of his or her circumstances, it is worth noting the effort necessary to cover up the infidelity. In fact, I think the aftermath of the cheating is actually the … Continue reading “Effort Involved”
Cheater labels you “the problem”
When a cheater is done with their spouse, they will treat the spouse as “The Problem.” This is a dangerous time for the faithful spouse because this is when they experience the full contempt of the cheater. Sadly, many pastors and other counselors egg the cheater to say more contemptuous things about the faithful spouse … Continue reading “Cheater labels you “the problem””
Strong Medicine Needed
“Nice” does not work with someone who has doubled down on destruction. If someone is about to run off a cliff, we don’t worry about saying a “harsh” word but rather–those who care–shout to get them to stop running. That is loving. Quietly objecting is not. The one running to their own destruction needs to … Continue reading “Strong Medicine Needed”
World Blown Apart
World Blown Apart Discovering marital infidelity is a discovery that blows apart one’s world. It upends the assumptions of safety one oriented life around. No longer can you trust your most intimate partner for anything. They have harmed you in deep ways that only they could. Such a betrayal! It is disorienting. What is my … Continue reading “World Blown Apart”
Faith is key!
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. -Hebrews 11:1, NIV But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. -Hebrews 11:6, KJV Faith … Continue reading “Faith is key!”
Stuck Phenomenon
Stuck Phenomenon Something I’ve noticed over the years working with faithful spouses is how Cheaters often stay stuck in the same cycles. They do not mature. Cheaters want to rehash the same arguments with us over and over again. This makes sense as they are trying to solve something that can only be solved through … Continue reading “Stuck Phenomenon”
Nineveh Example Set
“The people of Nineveh will stand up against this generation on judgment day and condemn it, for they repented of their sins at the preaching of Jonah. Now someone greater than Jonah is here–but you refuse to repent.” -Matthew 12:41, NLT Does repentance seem necessary for forgiveness (and salvation) according to these words from Jesus … Continue reading “Nineveh Example Set”
Funny how “no money” Cheaters…
“We have no money,” says Cheater. Funny how “no money” Cheaters always seem to find money to use on their affair partners. From meals to trips, they are flush when it comes to spending marital assets on someone else. That does not stop them from nitpicking their spouse’s spending, though. In those cases, “we” don’t … Continue reading “Funny how “no money” Cheaters…”
No shame for you.
“I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” -Matthew 19:9, NIV I do not see a time limit set on these words. The exemption is there for anyone who has a spouse that engaged in sexually unfaithful behavior. That is what I see in … Continue reading “No shame for you.”