For the woman’s jealous husband will be furious, and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge. -Proverbs 6:34, NLT In the early stages post-discovery, it is natural to try to wake up from the “bad dream.” Unfortunately, you will learn–painfully–that the genie cannot go back into that bottle. If you are at all … Continue reading “Cannot put the genie back in the bottle”
Category: Cheating
Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4, NLT Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming So, your Cheater admits to an “emotional affair.” They may even do this in the presence of a pastor or counselor. How does … Continue reading “Emotional Affair Back-Handed Blaming”
Cannot fix
14 Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. 15 These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death. -James 1:14-15, NLT A biblical approach to adultery situations will NEVER treat such sin as a symptom of a marriage problems! If they pastor … Continue reading “Cannot fix”
You’re such a threat, but…
Anyone here get labelled as “dangerous” and “angry” by your Cheater or her apologists? What I find curious about such labeling is how Cheaters know it is just that. They do not believe their actual press. When push comes to shove, Cheaters will call the person that they are “afraid of” to find true safety. … Continue reading “You’re such a threat, but…”
Don’t have to take it.
You do not have to take the lecture from the morally bankrupt Cheater. Walk away. Hang up the phone. End the session. A responsible pastor would do this for you in a session. Minimally, the pastor would correct the Cheater. However, you do not have to be passive in these situations. You have agency! If … Continue reading “Don’t have to take it.”
Still making demands?
If your cheater is still making demands…. …then you can be assured that they are not really sorry about cheating and did not really “get” the devastation of their sin against you. A person who cheats and grasps how awful a betrayal it is will not then turn on the faithful party to make relationship … Continue reading “Still making demands?”
“I protected YOUR reputation! So…”
“I protected YOUR reputation with our friends,” says Cheater. “So, I am asking you to do the same for me.” First, do not believe a proven liar, and Cheaters are proven liars. They are only saying this to control the narrative and protect their image. They assume here the faithful spouse will lie for their … Continue reading ““I protected YOUR reputation! So…””
The real choice
Even a faithful spouse “choosing” to divorce their cheater is really not the choice. They had chosen to be married for life to a person who left all others. However, that person decided to change things. They chose adultery. That just left bad options for the faithful spouse. The faithful spouse choosing divorce is a person … Continue reading “The real choice”
“Yeah, I know she cheated on you, but…”
“Yeah, I know she cheated on you, but you’ve got issues, too,” says false “friend.” You need to lose “friends” that respond in this sort of way to your infidelity trauma. They are not behaving as a friend. In fact, they are making things worse by equating your imperfections with a double-life of lies and … Continue reading ““Yeah, I know she cheated on you, but…””
I don’t get it.
I don’t get faithful spouses wanting to be friends with their Cheaters. Sure, there’s pressure to do this “for the kids” if kids are involved. Some may feel pressure from outsiders to do this to not burden them with the ugliness that is reality. It makes sense for Cheaters to want this–i.e. to be “friends.” … Continue reading “I don’t get it.”