The wicked flee though no one pursues…. -Proverbs 28:1a, NIV Disturbed people only see a history of cheating as leverage in a marriage. They could care less how the cheating has damaged and harmed the faithful spouse. The bigger problem for them is that they fear the faithful spouse “forever” holding it “over the head” … Continue reading “Leverage?! Really?!”
Category: Emotional Affair
Grief lingers
Grief lingers on long after forgiveness has put anger to bed. This is my experience now years removed from my divorce from a cheater. The anger is long gone. Yet I find myself feeling sad as I think of what was lost, tragically. I say tragically as it never had to happen. Yet God allows … Continue reading “Grief lingers”
PSA: No. They did NOT “have to” cheat on you!
Public Service Announcement (PSA): No. They did NOT have to cheat on you! No matter what. They chose sin over godliness, and that is on them. Personally, I think this is the most tragic thing about marital infidelity. It is also one of the oldest of lies. The cheater did not have to go … Continue reading “PSA: No. They did NOT “have to” cheat on you!”
Toying With Faithful Spouses
Some Cheaters are acutely aware of the power they have over the faithful spouse. They understand that divorcing their spouse will mean the professional destruction of the faithful spouse. Plus, they may know that the faithful spouse is highly committed to working through even infidelity. Maybe they understand the faithful spouse would do anything to … Continue reading “Toying With Faithful Spouses”
I care about you but…
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV I care about you BUT not enough… …to end my friendship with the adulterous spouse until she repents. My thoughts: “Sorry, your concern for me sounds skin deep. Scripture is clear that a person who … Continue reading “I care about you but…”
Sheep bite, too!
If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. -Galatians 5:15, NIV “Beware of false prophets who come disguised as harmless sheep but are really vicious wolves.” -Matthew 7:15, NLT Not everyone who comes to you as a “sheep” is one of Jesus’ flock. God knows. And … Continue reading “Sheep bite, too!”
More vicious
They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right. -Romans 2:15, NLT Sometimes Cheaters become crueler to their spouses when they are actively engaged in infidelity. They cheat and attend couples counseling where they tell the counselor or … Continue reading “More vicious”
Yes “….at just the right time”
You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. -Romans 5:6, NIV “At just the right time” I think we are conditioned as a species to think the “right time” is when we are able to “save ourselves.” We think that is when a partnership with God is appropriate. … Continue reading “Yes “….at just the right time””
Slipping up
“But if you fail to do this, you will be sinning against the Lord; and you may be sure that your sin will find you out.” -Numbers 32:23, NIV A slip. An admission is made. The veil of lies is lifted for a brief moment of truth-telling. Then it is back to the old games of … Continue reading “Slipping up”
Cheater Still Blaming Spouse
“Sure, I cheated in the past. But I sorted that with my individual therapist. We agreed my emotional affair was really just a symptom of my marriage problems,” says Cheater. So much of the pastoral or other Christian counseling is biased towards “saving” the marriage. This bias can lead to the pastor glossing over a … Continue reading “Cheater Still Blaming Spouse”