“I miss your cooking,” says Cheater who claims you’ve done nothing to contribute to the family ever. Cheaters often seek “justifications” to discard you. Truth is often a casualty of this doomed quest. Sure, they might use something that is partially true to attack you. However, a partial truth is still fully a lie. The … Continue reading ““I miss your cooking.””
Category: Sin
Why NOT so complicated
14 Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. 15 These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death. -James 1:14-15, NLT Save yourself the cost of exploring “why” they cheated. It is simple. They gave into the desires in their own hearts, … Continue reading “Why NOT so complicated”
Safe target
Safe Target I have a theory: I think some Cheaters cheat because they feel safe to do so with their faithful spouse. They never felt safe with their own family. So, they decide to rebel, not as a teenager, but as an adult. Sadly, this “rebellion” is very, VERY costly for the faithful spouse. In … Continue reading “Safe target”
Requiring You To Follow Their Advice
“You need to do this, or you wife will never come back,” says “friend.” I recently came across a video short on my phone. The speaker talked about how people who insist on you following their advice are not about care. They are about control. Some of us have had such “helpers” in our lives … Continue reading “Requiring You To Follow Their Advice”
A hug, not a kiss
“Goodbye in her eyes” by Zac Brown Band It wasn’t a kiss. It was a hug. We had just finished our dentist appointments. She had forgotten that she had made joint appointments. I had already confronted her about the Other Man about two weeks prior. She was still lying about him and still denying adultery. … Continue reading “A hug, not a kiss”
THE sin problem!
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Which is the biggest marital sin that one can commit according to the Bible? Adultery. Cheaters–and sometimes, even well-meaning pastors–sometimes treat adultery as a side problem to marriage troubles. This … Continue reading “THE sin problem!”
More vicious
They demonstrate that God’s law is written in their hearts, for their own conscience and thoughts either accuse them or tell them they are doing right. -Romans 2:15, NLT Sometimes Cheaters become crueler to their spouses when they are actively engaged in infidelity. They cheat and attend couples counseling where they tell the counselor or … Continue reading “More vicious”
Slipping up
“But if you fail to do this, you will be sinning against the Lord; and you may be sure that your sin will find you out.” -Numbers 32:23, NIV A slip. An admission is made. The veil of lies is lifted for a brief moment of truth-telling. Then it is back to the old games of … Continue reading “Slipping up”
Cheater Still Blaming Spouse
“Sure, I cheated in the past. But I sorted that with my individual therapist. We agreed my emotional affair was really just a symptom of my marriage problems,” says Cheater. So much of the pastoral or other Christian counseling is biased towards “saving” the marriage. This bias can lead to the pastor glossing over a … Continue reading “Cheater Still Blaming Spouse”
Expectations: Model Christian Divorcee
“’I am innocent, but it makes no difference to me— I despise my life. Innocent or wicked, it is all the same to God. That’s why I say, ‘He destroys both the blameless and the wicked.’” -Job 9:21-22, NLT Ever noticed the pressure among Christians to talk about “our part” when our marriages end in divorce–even … Continue reading “Expectations: Model Christian Divorcee”