JannaG asks: What should forgiveness of an unrepentant adulterer look like when you’ve divorced and they’re remarried and you haven’t had any contact in years? Well, I will begin by saying the spiritual well-being of the adulterer is not the responsibility of the faithful ex-spouse. You are under no obligation to reach out to this … Continue reading “Mailbag: What does forgiveness look like for an unrepentant, remarried adulterer?”
Category: Sin
Not condemned.
It is the Sovereign Lord who helps me. Who will condemn me? They will all wear out like a garment; the moths will eat them up. -Isaiah 50:9, NIV God is on the side of righteousness. In the case of adultery, that means God is on the “side” of the faithful spouse. He is not participating in their condemnation. I … Continue reading “Not condemned.”
Cheaters with the “Divorce” Card
“I don’t think I feel God has told me to take divorce off the table.” – Cheater Cheaters are awful. They torture faithful spouses with glimpses of hope. Then they continue to lie and cheat leading the faithful spouse to believe the faithful spouse was why the marriage died. It is one thing for a … Continue reading “Cheaters with the “Divorce” Card”
Cheater-speak: “Oh well, we are all sinners after all.”
“Oh well, we are all sinners after all.” -Cheater This lame religious excuse may be heard coming from the adulterous spouse and/or other Christian “apologists” seeking “neutral” ground in this situation. While it sounds wise and caring, it is really an extremely poor application of Biblical truth to the situation. Can you imagine accepting this … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “Oh well, we are all sinners after all.””
Rev. Bill Hybels and Willow Creek Church deny sexual impropriety accusations
Rev. Bill Hybels of the megachurch fame is in the news. He is the latest of those touched–whether justly or unjustly–by the #MeToo era. I am not going to go into the blow by blow of the situation. You can read the details of the story from Chicago Tribune (here) and Christianity Today (here). … Continue reading “Rev. Bill Hybels and Willow Creek Church deny sexual impropriety accusations”
Freeing and Punishing Truth
“But I tell you that everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned.” -Matthew 12:36-37, NIV When reconstructing one’s narrative, truth can be both freeing and punishing. It is … Continue reading “Freeing and Punishing Truth”
Faithful Spouses no less forgiving than Jesus…
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you…. and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” -Jesus in Matthew 18:15a, 17b, NIV Was Jesus being “unforgiving” to demand the offender listen to their victim? Christians … Continue reading “Faithful Spouses no less forgiving than Jesus…”
Fear God, Not “Man”
Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe. -Proverbs 29:25, NIV Fearing what the cheater or other Christians think of you is very real for faithful spouses. This fear is one of the many reasons faithful spouses stay stuck in abusive relationships where the … Continue reading “Fear God, Not “Man””
Handling Self-Righteous, Religious Pricks
“And why worry about a speck in your friend’s eye when you have a log in your own? … Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye…” – Matthew 7:3, 5a, NLT When I was going through my trials, I had no shortage of religious people willing to “help” me see my “sin” or … Continue reading “Handling Self-Righteous, Religious Pricks”
A godly aversion.
The righteous detest the dishonest; the wicked detest the upright. -Proverbs 29:27, NIV When I was looking at this chapter in Proverbs, this particular verse jumped out at me. The language is awfully strong in its condemnation of dishonesty. I could not help but apply it to matters of infidelity. God’s heart towards dishonesty is … Continue reading “A godly aversion.”