The “Unmet Needs” Lie Theory This is the lie theory that teaches faithful spouses that their deficiencies at home is what drove the adulterous spouse to cheat. The faithful spouse was not sexually available enough. The faithful spouse was not emotionally adept and engaged enough. You know the drill. I have heard in horror how … Continue reading ““Unmet Needs” (Lie) Theory”
Category: Sin
John Piper is wrong on prohibiting divorce following adultery.
Pastor John Piper is a major figure in Reformed, Evangelical Christianity in the United States. He hails from Minnesota. Having heard him preach myself years ago, I would say that he is a very gifted communicator, and I do not doubt his passion for Christ. He strikes me as a man who is sincere about … Continue reading “John Piper is wrong on prohibiting divorce following adultery.”
“I’m concerned.” Others judging faithful spouses.
“Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” -Matthew 7:1-2, KJV A common annoyance I encounter–and suspect other faithful spouses encounter as well–are Christians giving their unsolicited assessment of my state of healing. They … Continue reading ““I’m concerned.” Others judging faithful spouses.”
Buffet from Hell – A Buffet of Bad Options
“‘If a man is found lying with a married woman, then both of them shall die, the man who lay with the woman, and the woman; thus you shall purge the evil from Israel.” -Deuteronomy 22:22, NASB. While much is made of God’s proclamation of hating divorce in Malachi 2:16, I fear that many pastors … Continue reading “Buffet from Hell – A Buffet of Bad Options”
Adultery is much bigger a problem than the singular sexual act!
“‘But the things that come out of a person’s mouth come from the heart, and these defile them. For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what defile a person….’” – Jesus in Matthew 15:18-20a, NIV. While one act of adultery is horrible enough, I suspect … Continue reading “Adultery is much bigger a problem than the singular sexual act!”
Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse
A Christian brother comes over one night. He crumples onto your couch tears overflowing. Through his heaving sobs, you learn his wife has left him and is having sex with another man. The hollow and desperate look in his eyes tears at your heart. What can you do? I will start with the negative first. These dangerous responses … Continue reading “Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse”
The Torturous Dance to Divorce
There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health. -Proverbs 12:18, KJV Cheaters are often very cruel to their spouses. Besides the whole soul rape part, these characters are known to attend couples therapy or pastoral Care sessions only to beat up upon the faithful spouse emotionally. Cheating on the … Continue reading “The Torturous Dance to Divorce”
“You need to focus on your stuff,” says cheater apologist.
“Sure, she cheated. But you need to focus on your stuff.” -Cheater Apologist What never ceases to amaze me is how obtuse some people are as it comes to marital infidelity situations. They could be convinced about the facts; yet, some still choose to apply the pressure on the adultery victim, not the perpetrator. Either … Continue reading ““You need to focus on your stuff,” says cheater apologist.”
Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!
Where are all the personal responsibility preachers when it comes to talking to cheaters?! -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility for “their part” in the divorce. -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility to forgive their cheater. (In fact, they feel compelled to “speak into” the faithful spouse’s … Continue reading “Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!”
The warped world of a cheater
This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. -John 3:19, NIV The Warped World of Cheaters When you have trouble admitting truth, your grip with reality will become looser and looser. Along with that loosening grip, your world will become warped. This … Continue reading “The warped world of a cheater”