Gabriel appeared to her and said, “Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you!” -Luke 1:28, NLT Merry Christmas! Whether this is truly a day of celebration or merely a day to endure, I think much is present to encourage. Both was the case on the first Christmas. It was not all singing angels and wonderfulness. … Continue reading “Mess? That’s the real Christmas.”
Category: Sin
Divorce And the Original Christmas Story
This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, … Continue reading “Divorce And the Original Christmas Story”
Crummy Cheaters on Christmas
What is it about the holiday season that seems to bring out the worse in cheaters? I will never forget the winter flight I took home alone with an empty seat next to mine. My cheater had decided that she could not emotionally hack a Christmas with my family. Instead, she stayed with a “Brutus … Continue reading “Crummy Cheaters on Christmas”
“But she looked so miserable.”
“But she looked so miserable. You must have been doing or not doing something to make her so.” -Cheater Apologist What if–and this is apparently a radical idea–we treat wives and husbands as independently responsible for care-taking their own emotional lives. I have no doubt some cheaters are truly miserable as their marriages come to … Continue reading ““But she looked so miserable.””
PSA: Sorry Caught Cheaters
Public Service Announcement: Cheaters who only say sorry for what you caught them doing are really only sorry that they got caught. Some cheaters have so much contempt for us, faithful spouses, that they will ask for our information and sources in order to only confess up to the exact point of exposure to us. … Continue reading “PSA: Sorry Caught Cheaters”
Mailbag: What does learning to embrace one’s quirkiness mean?
Dear DM, When you say you had to learn to love yourself quirkiness, introvertness and all – do you mean that you struggled with blaming yourself for your ex’s rejection? I’m 5 years out and have definitely been blessed by God since the divorce. I still have this anxiety about it having been my fault … Continue reading “Mailbag: What does learning to embrace one’s quirkiness mean?”
When most vulnerable…
Cheaters seem to thrive on cheating when their spouse is most vulnerable. This is yet another demonic pattern that I have noticed. The vulnerable time might take multiple forms: -Maybe the faithful spouse is in a fight for her life dealing with breast cancer? -Maybe it is a faithful husband who just was fired from … Continue reading “When most vulnerable…”
Cheater-Speak: “I thought you would get angry.” Continued…
“I thought you would get angry. That is why I didn’t tell you.” -Cheater (on why she lied) to faithful spouse This sort of statement is red meat to therapists and pastors who see their roles as rescuers. They hear something like this, and immediately jump to rescue the (cheating) “damsel in distress.” They are … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I thought you would get angry.” Continued…”
Cheater-Speak: “I was afraid you would get angry.”
“I was afraid you would get angry. That is why I did not tell you [I was cheating on you].” -Cheater Isn’t it amazing how a cheater can make their own lies your fault? Now, we know their lies are their lies. However, cheaters are adept at shifting blame. This sort of mind trick was noted on … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I was afraid you would get angry.””
Just looking for an excuse to divorce? Really?!
Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for just any reason?” -Mathew 19:3, NLT Are faithful spouses just looking for an excuse to divorce? Pastors, do you really think this? I am astounded that some pastors and Christian leaders believe faithful spouses … Continue reading “Just looking for an excuse to divorce? Really?!”