If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both the man who slept with her and the woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, NIV “Adultery or fornication committed after a contract, being detected before marriage, gives just occasion to the innocent party to dissolve that contract. In the … Continue reading “Blind to divorce prejudice”
Category: Sin
Called to ministry of reconciliation. To Cheaters, too?
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…. – 2 Corinthians 5:18, NIV Do we not all have the ministry of reconciliation as followers of Christ? Does that include reconciling with Cheaters? The obvious answer to the first question is “Yes, we are called … Continue reading “Called to ministry of reconciliation. To Cheaters, too?”
True god of some Cheaters
21 For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. -Matthew 6:21, NIV 24 “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money. -Matthew 6:24, NLT “Mine, mine, mine!” cries … Continue reading “True god of some Cheaters”
Important to have validation
Reality validation. This is gift others can give to a faithful spouse. Sometimes we need someone to tell us the simple but hard truth. The adultery happened. And–no–we are in no way responsible for the infidelity. It was wrong. No justification for the cheater cheating exists. I think these messages are especially important for the … Continue reading “Important to have validation”
Shake off your Cheater’s dust!
“But if any place refuses to welcome you or listen to you, shake its dust from your feet as you leave to show that you have abandoned those people to their fate.” -Mark 6:11, NLT At some point, we need to let go of the need for an apology and reparations for the wrongs we … Continue reading “Shake off your Cheater’s dust!”
Tenaciously holding on to truth
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” -John 8:32, NIV Regardless of how we feel or what other people–including professionals–say, we did not “make” them cheat and thereby abuse us. This is an important truth to hold on to through this dark season. We are not responsible for another’s … Continue reading “Tenaciously holding on to truth”
Need accountability, not ego-strokes!
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV Cheaters do not need reminders of their special-ness. They do NOT need ego-strokes. They need reminders that they are accountable for their sinful behavior. A godly pastor will keep this in mind … Continue reading “Need accountability, not ego-strokes!”
Good and bad news regarding friends
A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. -Proverbs 17:17, NLT Good news and bad news about friends during times of marital distress: First, I will share the bad news: Some of the most painful betrayals will be friends and even family choosing the cheater over … Continue reading “Good and bad news regarding friends”
“…forsaking all others…” means no dating!
If you are still married, you ought not to date. This is an integrity issue. A vow is made to “forsake all others” and dating another while that vow is in effect legally is a violation of your word. Cheaters do this all the time. They make up “excuses” for why they are “allowed” to … Continue reading ““…forsaking all others…” means no dating!”
What went wrong?
“Could we meet up and discuss what went wrong between us?” asks Cheater. You would be forgiven if you thought this question was about understanding and information exchange. It is not. Cheaters know that they cheated. What they do not have is a way to offload their guilt effectively. THAT is the purpose of the … Continue reading “What went wrong?”