Tell me how your marriage fell apart is NOT a biblical diagnostic prompt. This sort of prompt is what it looks like to bow to secular psychology and ignore biblical diagnosis of terminal marital sin. Now, this prompt might lead to a story involving terminal marital sin. AND it might lead to a long story where blame … Continue reading “Simple Terminal Marital Sin Diagnosis”
Category: Theology of divorce
Gaining peace
…”I said about them, ‘They wander in their hearts just like they do with their feet, and they refuse to learn my ways.’My heart grieved over them so I decreed: ‘They will never enter into the calming rest of my Spirit!’ ” -Hebrews 3:10b-11, TPT While it might not feel like it initially, divorcing a cheater can lead … Continue reading “Gaining peace”
If a pastor asks you…
If a pastor asks a faithful spouse about your part in the divorce from a known cheater, that is a sign his advice for you is not going to be godly or good for you. This sort of blame-assigning question is like stomping on someone’s foot and then asking your victim what was his part in … Continue reading “If a pastor asks you…”
Dear DM, My wife says that she deserves to be happy.
Dear Divorce Minister, I am separated from my wife. She left me and our boys, age 12, on November 2nd 2018. She said she was stressed dealing with one of our sons who has ADHD and ODD. At first, it was a 30 day separation and I was a good dad, husband, provider, etc. She … Continue reading “Dear DM, My wife says that she deserves to be happy.”
Be cautious in sharing with (ex) in-laws!
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. -Ephesians 6:4, NIV I made an honest mistake when my marriage started to unravel: My mistake was to open and share my heart to the father of my (now) ex-wife. It was an honest mistake in that I … Continue reading “Be cautious in sharing with (ex) in-laws!”
Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?”
And he [God] said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” -Genesis 22:2, KJV “Maybe God is asking me to sacrifice my marriage like … Continue reading “Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?””
Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!
***Marriage is not a happy-making contract!*** The seemingly accepted “wisdom” on dealing with infidelity–especially emotional affairs–is to look to the marriage relationship for what was “missing.” In other words, why was the cheater unhappy? Besides being predicated on a sociologically proven false premise–i.e. cheaters only cheat when they are unhappy in their marriages (see Dr. … Continue reading “Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!”
Do not blame the faithful spouse for the cheater’s lack of repentance
“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” -Matthew 23:37, NIV An injustice faithful spouses experience when divorce is on the table is being blamed for … Continue reading “Do not blame the faithful spouse for the cheater’s lack of repentance”
Cheaters as entitled and arrogant!
Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy? But he giveth more grace. Wherefore … Continue reading “Cheaters as entitled and arrogant!”
Cheaters claiming the “toxic shame” excuse
Rid yourselves of all the offenses you have committed, and get a new heart and a new spirit. Why will you die, people of Israel? For I take no pleasure in the death of anyone, declares the Sovereign Lord. Repent and live! -Ezekiel 18:31-32, NIV How does the “toxic shame” excuse work? It is actually … Continue reading “Cheaters claiming the “toxic shame” excuse”