Most assuredly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the ground and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it produces much grain. -John 12:24, NKJV Death is not pleasant. I do not care how prepared one is. We were not made to die; rather, we were made to live … Continue reading “Death leading to new life”
Category: Theology of divorce
“Thou shalt not commit adultery” is far from unclear, folks!
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV When an adulterous spouse feigns ignorance or confusion over the ending of their marriage, it is a ploy to avoid taking responsibility. This isn’t rocket science, folks! God does not command the ending of a marriage over adultery in the Old Testament to signal such sin is … Continue reading ““Thou shalt not commit adultery” is far from unclear, folks!”
Simple Terminal Marital Sin Diagnosis
Tell me how your marriage fell apart is NOT a biblical diagnostic prompt. This sort of prompt is what it looks like to bow to secular psychology and ignore biblical diagnosis of terminal marital sin. Now, this prompt might lead to a story involving terminal marital sin. AND it might lead to a long story where blame … Continue reading “Simple Terminal Marital Sin Diagnosis”
Gaining peace
…”I said about them, ‘They wander in their hearts just like they do with their feet, and they refuse to learn my ways.’My heart grieved over them so I decreed: ‘They will never enter into the calming rest of my Spirit!’ ” -Hebrews 3:10b-11, TPT While it might not feel like it initially, divorcing a cheater can lead … Continue reading “Gaining peace”
If a pastor asks you…
If a pastor asks a faithful spouse about your part in the divorce from a known cheater, that is a sign his advice for you is not going to be godly or good for you. This sort of blame-assigning question is like stomping on someone’s foot and then asking your victim what was his part in … Continue reading “If a pastor asks you…”
Dear DM, My wife says that she deserves to be happy.
Dear Divorce Minister, I am separated from my wife. She left me and our boys, age 12, on November 2nd 2018. She said she was stressed dealing with one of our sons who has ADHD and ODD. At first, it was a 30 day separation and I was a good dad, husband, provider, etc. She … Continue reading “Dear DM, My wife says that she deserves to be happy.”
Be cautious in sharing with (ex) in-laws!
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. -Ephesians 6:4, NIV I made an honest mistake when my marriage started to unravel: My mistake was to open and share my heart to the father of my (now) ex-wife. It was an honest mistake in that I … Continue reading “Be cautious in sharing with (ex) in-laws!”
Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?”
And he [God] said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” -Genesis 22:2, KJV “Maybe God is asking me to sacrifice my marriage like … Continue reading “Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?””
Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!
***Marriage is not a happy-making contract!*** The seemingly accepted “wisdom” on dealing with infidelity–especially emotional affairs–is to look to the marriage relationship for what was “missing.” In other words, why was the cheater unhappy? Besides being predicated on a sociologically proven false premise–i.e. cheaters only cheat when they are unhappy in their marriages (see Dr. … Continue reading “Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!”
Do not blame the faithful spouse for the cheater’s lack of repentance
“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” -Matthew 23:37, NIV An injustice faithful spouses experience when divorce is on the table is being blamed for … Continue reading “Do not blame the faithful spouse for the cheater’s lack of repentance”