The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it? -Jeremiah 17:9, KJV I think this verse is especially true of the so called “Christian” cheaters. They lie to themselves first. Then they lie to others. If you were not the recipient of the harm, you could almost feel pity for … Continue reading “Deceitful heart”
Author: Divorce Minister
“Forgiveness” Rather Than Repentance “Concerned” People
…and if you see him going the wrong direction, cry out and correct him. If there is true repentance on his part, forgive him. -Luke 17:3, TPT I wonder if you have experienced versions of these questions or statements. They usually come from well-meaning (but emotionally and biblically tone-deaf) Christians: “So, have you forgiven her?” … Continue reading ““Forgiveness” Rather Than Repentance “Concerned” People”
Feeling fellowship with Christ, the Forsaken
“My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” -Matthew 27:46b, KJV When I was struggling the most, these words from Jesus brought me the greatest comfort. They were reminders to me that God understood the pain and suffering that I was enduring. He could relate. Jesus understands what it meant to suffer unjustly. Jesus understands … Continue reading “Feeling fellowship with Christ, the Forsaken”
Keep telling your story, please!
Telling the story of what happened is important if we want to change how people treat faithful spouses. The larger narrative starts to change when people learn that their friend, colleague, or even family member was mistreated by a cheater. It changes because they are emotionally invested in you and your hurts matter to them. … Continue reading “Keep telling your story, please!”
And then they are nothing more than a footnote
I want to encourage those who are recent arrivals to this digital shore. It does get better. The sharp, intense emotional pain does lessen over time. Thoughts of your cheater become less and less as you heal. In fact, one day–I don’t know when it will be for you–you will wake up and spend a … Continue reading “And then they are nothing more than a footnote”
Pondering eternal destination of cheaters
26 If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, 27 but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. -Hebrews 10:26-27, NIV Do I think unrepentant adulterous spouses are going to Hell? I would answer you with a question: … Continue reading “Pondering eternal destination of cheaters”
PSA: “Forsaking all others” means NO emotional affairs, too!
Public Service Announcement: The marriage vow of “forsaking all others” excludes emotional affairs, too! I say this to emphasize the need to take emotional affairs seriously. When a spouse cares more about how a third party partner feels than their own spouse, they are being unfaithful to their sacred marriage vows. They have given their … Continue reading “PSA: “Forsaking all others” means NO emotional affairs, too!”
Mark Driscoll and his toxic headship teaching
“Let’s say, for example, there’s a daughter, and she’s got a close relationship with her covenant head Christian dad. That headship protects her from other boys who want to come along and be her head, tell her what to do, set an identity for her, abuse her, endanger her. It protects her from other young … Continue reading “Mark Driscoll and his toxic headship teaching”
Three Key Points for Pastors on Adultery Situations
-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “Three Key Points for Pastors on Adultery Situations”
If cheater never had any good qualities, divorce would not hurt as much.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. -Genesis 1:27, KJV Divorcing a cheater would not hurt as much if she was pure evil. That is my opinion. I am not saying what she did was anything less than evil. That is pure … Continue reading “If cheater never had any good qualities, divorce would not hurt as much.”