“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” -Matthew 23:37, NIV An injustice faithful spouses experience when divorce is on the table is being blamed for … Continue reading “Do not blame the faithful spouse for the cheater’s lack of repentance”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Relief of Acknowledgment
Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. -Romans 12:15, KJV When going through adultery discovery, the validation of true friends is a balm to a hurting soul. Religious people are tempted to foist “forgiveness” on the grieving faithful spouse. They skip over the acknowledgement of the severe injustices the faithful … Continue reading “Relief of Acknowledgment”
Cheaters as entitled and arrogant!
Ye adulterers and adulteresses, know ye not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God? whosoever therefore will be a friend of the world is the enemy of God. Do ye think that the scripture saith in vain, The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy? But he giveth more grace. Wherefore … Continue reading “Cheaters as entitled and arrogant!”
You are wanted.
Even before he made the world, God loved us and chose us in Christ to be holy and without fault in his eyes. -Ephesians 1:4, NLT When going through a divorce–especially against one’s will and/or with infidelity involved–the lies of rejection and shame are almost tangible. This is a time to hone in on the … Continue reading “You are wanted.”
Like a Million Dollar Loss
3 But the poor man had nothing, save one little ewe lamb, which he had bought and nourished up: and it grew up together with him, and with his children; it did eat of his own meat, and drank of his own cup, and lay in his bosom, and was unto him as a daughter. … Continue reading “Like a Million Dollar Loss”
Deception by denial
How many were deceived for a longer period of time because your cheater explicitly denied what he or she was doing? “I would never cheat on you.” “You know me better than that. There isn’t another man [woman] involved.” “We need to focus on your problems. Don’t worry about me. I wouldn’t cheat on you.” … Continue reading “Deception by denial”
Those type of “friends”
If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both must die. Purge that evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, The Message (emphasis mine) Those “friends” One of the most difficult lessons I learned from discovering my first wife’s adultery and going through divorce is that it is okay–in fact, good–to have deal-breakers in friendships. … Continue reading “Those type of “friends””
When the cheater sees you as the bigger transgressor
Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye. -Matthew 7:5, NLT When a cheater sees the faithful spouse as the greater transgressor in the relationship, I see no hope for a godly reunion and restoration of the … Continue reading “When the cheater sees you as the bigger transgressor”
Dismissive People
For the Lord is righteous, he loves justice…. -Psalm 11:7a, NIV Caring for faithful spouses is a justice issue, in my opinion. I know many issues in this world are related to the imbalance of justice. Adultery and adultery victims are not the only ones suffering from a world run through with injustice. Yet they are suffering injustices. If we … Continue reading “Dismissive People”
Awful Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.
“For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what defile a person….” -Matthew 15:19-20a, NIV Bad marriages cause infidelity = Lie! When Jesus talks here about sexual immorality and adultery, I do not see any long explanation about the sad state of the culture around … Continue reading “Awful Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.”