For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. -John 3:17, KJV Jesus is the only One who is able to save someone spiritually. How well or poorly we respond to discovering infidelity ought never to be construed as causing the cheater … Continue reading “Savior You Are NOT!”
Category: Trauma of adultery
When “good” is not an option
Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts. -Hosea 2:2b, NIV What drives me nuts about how some pastors speak of divorce is how they assume a “good” option is left on the table for a faithful spouse. Sadly, following infidelity this just isn’t the case! The faithful … Continue reading “When “good” is not an option”
Like a super suckerpunch to the gut!
“At every street corner you built your lofty shrines and degraded your beauty, spreading your legs with increasing promiscuity to anyone who passed by. … You adulterous wife! You prefer strangers to your own husband!” -Ezekiel 16:25,32, NIV Nothing really prepares you for that moment of discovery. Nothing. You might have suspected the … Continue reading “Like a super suckerpunch to the gut!”
Divorce Minister: Palm Sunday Reflections
See, your king comes to you, righteous and victorious, lowly and riding on a donkey, on a colt, the foal of a donkey. -Zachariah 9:9b, NIV With the kick-off of Holy Week, I was pondering how this season parallels life for faithful spouses and marriages ended via adultery. The wedding day is like Palm Sunday: … Continue reading “Divorce Minister: Palm Sunday Reflections”
SO Self-Righteous!
How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. -Luke 6:42, … Continue reading “SO Self-Righteous!”
Personal Growth Or Just Blame Acceptance!
And he said, That which cometh out of the man, that defileth the man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man. – Mark 7:20-23, KJV, (emphasis mine) When … Continue reading “Personal Growth Or Just Blame Acceptance!”
Name it!
But Jesus said, “Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” -Luke 22:48, NLT As I work to prepare for Easter, I was struck by this exchange. Notice how Jesus calls out the action for what it was. Jesus labels it betrayal and points out the especially awful means of that betrayal–namely, … Continue reading “Name it!”
Who is served by the “reminder” to forgive the cheater?
Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. -Romans 12:15, NKJV What astounds me about some Christians is how they believe they are helping faithful spouses by telling them that they must forgive their cheater. Most of us–faithful spouses–already understand forgiving our cheater is on docket of things to do in the … Continue reading “Who is served by the “reminder” to forgive the cheater?”
My take on the forgiveness command found in Matthew 6:14-15
One good thing that came out of my ex-wife’s adultery and my consequential divorce from her is that I know God’s Word much better than before particularly in regards to forgiveness and repentance. A lot of what I got from the Christian community was Matt 6:14-15: 14 For if you forgive other people when they … Continue reading “My take on the forgiveness command found in Matthew 6:14-15”
Super Stupid and Divisive
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother…. -Genesis 2:24a, NKJV Having a father-in-law (FIL) tell his son-in-law how he is “failing” as a husband and man–in general–is incredibly stupid and divisive on the part of the FIL. Something like that happened in my situation as I remember it. I look back on that … Continue reading “Super Stupid and Divisive”