When you have a cheater engaging in a series of affairs, you have someone who is trying to fix the internal with the external. This is not about the marriage. The affairs reveal a heart that is in need of spiritual and emotional healing. It is an internal issue within the cheater needing addressing. A … Continue reading “A series of affairs”
Category: Trauma of adultery
3 Things Pastors Need To Know About Adultery
-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “3 Things Pastors Need To Know About Adultery”
Not pure evil and that is why it hurts so much!
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. -Genesis 1:27, KJV Divorcing a cheater would not hurt as much if she was pure evil. That is my opinion. I am not saying what she did was anything less than evil. That is pure … Continue reading “Not pure evil and that is why it hurts so much!”
Next step? Shake off their dust!
And whosoever will not receive you, when ye go out of that city, shake off the very dust from your feet for a testimony against them. -Luke 9:5, KJV Jesus gave us a ministry of reconciliation (see 2 Corinthians 5:18), yet Jesus told His Disciples to move on if this ministry was rejected! Cheaters reject godly reconciliation … Continue reading “Next step? Shake off their dust!”
You need someone to take care of you?!
“You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there.” -I Kings 17:4, NIV Do you need someone to take care of you?! This accusation was aimed to shame. It was aimed to suggest the person hearing it was less than an adult. But it missed the … Continue reading “You need someone to take care of you?!”
Mailbag: Why does a spouse cheat on their spouse who is a pastor?
Why would a spouse married to a pastor or chaplain cheat on him (or her)? My answer to this question really is the same answer I would give to someone who asked why their spouse cheated on them. It really is simple. The cheater somewhere accepted an “excusing lie” that permitted them to cheat. A … Continue reading “Mailbag: Why does a spouse cheat on their spouse who is a pastor?”
Mailbag: Common sort of arguments with a cheater?
Divorce Minister, Thank you so much for this blog. This has become a place I go to on a daily basis for answers and general enlightenment. So, I have another question for you. I’m still living my “best life now” with my WW. 😳 The actual infidelity was many years ago. But, since that time … Continue reading “Mailbag: Common sort of arguments with a cheater?”
PSA: Cheating is a choice.
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4, NLT Choosing to cheat is just that… A CHOICE! It is a sinful choice. And a God-defying choice. A choice that the chooser explicitly said, promised, and vowed … Continue reading “PSA: Cheating is a choice.”
Pride before fall. Cheaters thinking they will never get caught.
But if you fail to keep your word, then you will have sinned against the LORD, and you may be sure that your sin will find you out. -Numbers 32:23, NLT (emphasis mine) What amazes me is how cheaters seem to believe their sins and treachery are beyond discovery by faithful spouses! To be fair, … Continue reading “Pride before fall. Cheaters thinking they will never get caught.”
On preferring “to be imagining things”
Discovering you spouse has been committing adultery is an incredibly traumatic experience. -You want to be wrong–even crazy is preferable to the real traumatic mess this actually is! -You want your world NOT to be upended and obliterated like it is. -In short, you want to wake up from this nightmare. This is grief and … Continue reading “On preferring “to be imagining things””