After a Saturday football game, my college coaches would take the game “film” and grade how each of us–athletes–performed in that contest. One category used in their film grading system was called “critical errors.” This label was reserved for mistakes so big that the mistake caused the play to fail. For an offensive lineman, a … Continue reading “Film Grading, Critical Errors, and Understanding Infidelity”
Category: Emotional Affair
“I said it was a mistake!”
I said it was a mistake. What more do you want me to say?! -Cheater What drives me nuts with some Christians is how a cheater admitting to “a mistake” is enough for them. They take the bait, then they turn on the faithful spouse to figure out what he or she did or didn’t … Continue reading ““I said it was a mistake!””
Does through ‘better or worse’ include infidelity?
“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT Does staying married through ‘better or worse’ include through infidelity? Short answer: No. Here’s the longer, biblical reasons I say that… I quote Leviticus 20:10 not to suggest that we … Continue reading “Does through ‘better or worse’ include infidelity?”
But what about the damage to their reputation?!
“Keep it as quiet as possible. Just think about the damage done to other relationships if you tell them she cheated on you [aka the truth].” -Standard (Awful) Advice Such concern for the damage of relationships is too in coming late. Actions reveal character. Character often shapes reputation. If a cheater wanted a good reputation, … Continue reading “But what about the damage to their reputation?!”
Disagreeing with “Duck Dynasty” Al and Lisa Robertson on Divorce
A reader sent me an article promoting a book by Al and Lisa Robertson of “Duck Dynasty” fame. In the article “Al and Lisa Robertson: Rebuilding After an Affair,” the story of Lisa’s repeated infidelity is shared along with their advice to couples to remain married even after adultery. The article bothered the reader sending … Continue reading “Disagreeing with “Duck Dynasty” Al and Lisa Robertson on Divorce”
Re: Comment on “I hate the movie ‘Fireproof'”
In a comment on my post, “I hate the movie ‘Fireproof,’” Katygirl wrote: I’m thankful that God uses all things for those who love him and are called according to His purpose. I am also thankful that the teaching fundamental of this movie and book are that love covers a multitude of sins. I don’t … Continue reading “Re: Comment on “I hate the movie ‘Fireproof’””
Not All Doom and Gloom
The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part. -Job 42:12a, NIV With all the fear-mongering that happens in evangelical Christian circles, one might think divorce dooms you to a life of misery. Or… I think this might be worse–it means you will always have a second-class marriage if you … Continue reading “Not All Doom and Gloom”
Thoughts for Cheaters
For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword. -Proverbs 5:3-4, NIV So, a friend cheated. What do you do? What do you say to them? 1. Urge them to come COMPLETELY clean with … Continue reading “Thoughts for Cheaters”
Confessing Is NOT Causing
Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are … Continue reading “Confessing Is NOT Causing”
On “Deadwood Friends”
But Jesus said, “Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” -Luke 22:48, NLT Some “friends” will “kiss” you with words-bespeaking of their love for you-while they further the cheater’s agenda of blame-shifting the infidelity and marriage’s demise upon you. It is confusing enough dealing with the lies and deceptions of a … Continue reading “On “Deadwood Friends””