Hi DM, This one is a doozy so bear with me. Long story short, I was married for 10 years to a guy I had known for 20 (grew up together). Thought we were happy in the marriage, before uncovering his infidelities (Ashley Madison accounts, hours of pornography each day, hidden Snapchat account where he … Continue reading “Dear DM: Do I participate in the Cheater’s Catholic annulment process?”
Category: Grief
Did your cheater try to enlist others against you?
Did your cheater try to enlist others against you? One of the nastier aspects of dealing with a cheater is how they decimate (or attempt to decimate) your own support system. They may have even started this process of turning people against you well before you had a clue about the cheating. Some cheaters might … Continue reading “Did your cheater try to enlist others against you?”
And then they are nothing more than a footnote
I want to encourage those who are recent arrivals to this digital shore. It does get better. The sharp, intense emotional pain does lessen over time. Thoughts of your cheater become less and less as you heal. In fact, one day–I don’t know when it will be for you–you will wake up and spend a … Continue reading “And then they are nothing more than a footnote”
Three Key Points for Pastors on Adultery Situations
-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “Three Key Points for Pastors on Adultery Situations”
Not ashamed of my pets “taking care of” me
“You will drink from the brook, and I have directed the ravens to supply you with food there.” -I Kings 17:4, NIV “Do you need someone to take care of you?!” This accusation was aimed at me to shame. It was aimed to suggest the person hearing it was less than an adult. But it … Continue reading “Not ashamed of my pets “taking care of” me”
Even Jesus accepted the fact of rejection
“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, the city that kills the prophets and stones God’s messengers! How often I have wanted to gather your children together as a hen protects her chicks beneath her wings, but you wouldn’t let me.” -Matthew 23:37, NLT Jesus wanted to see the Jewish people turn to him. We see this in this … Continue reading “Even Jesus accepted the fact of rejection”
Like losing a million bucks
3 But the poor man had nothing, save one little ewe lamb, which he had bought and nourished up: and it grew up together with him, and with his children; it did eat of his own meat, and drank of his own cup, and lay in his bosom, and was unto him as a daughter. … Continue reading “Like losing a million bucks”
Those “friends” are not your friends!
If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both must die. Purge that evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, The Message (emphasis mine) Those “friends” One of the most difficult lessons I learned from discovering my first wife’s adultery and going through divorce is that it is okay–in fact, good–to have deal-breakers in friendships. … Continue reading “Those “friends” are not your friends!”
Might have wasted more years!
In his mercy, God knew I probably would have held onto my first marriage well beyond what was good for me. So, my ex filed on me, and I decided fighting the divorce was not worth it. I was not going to fight against a divorce that a cheater was seeking. That was her choice–yet … Continue reading “Might have wasted more years!”
Unwanted (at the time) path
“…when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” -John 21:18b, NIV Unfortunately, I was the first. Somehow, my huge family had never experienced a divorce on either side of the immediate family. But I became the first … Continue reading “Unwanted (at the time) path”