“I will place shepherds over them who will tend them, and they will no longer be afraid or terrified, nor will any be missing,” declares the Lord. -Jeremiah 23:4, NIV One of the sad lessons I have picked up over the years is how to spot bad, spiritually abusive pastors. The probably biggest clue to … Continue reading “True Shepherds Care and Do NOT Use Fear!”
Author: Divorce Minister
Complex feelings
Yesterday, I received some disappointing news regarding a management job I interviewed to get. I did not get the job. I would be lying to say I did not feel sad, angry, and disappointed about this. Yet I also feel relief and hope that, perhaps, God is directing even this disappointment for my good (see … Continue reading “Complex feelings”
Love? Nope.
20 If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a fellow believer,that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? -I John 4:20, NLT Is this love? Lying to, abusing, stealing, and otherwise risking the well-being of another. Nope. Of course, not. … Continue reading “Love? Nope.”
Friends post adultery revelation
A friend is always loyal, and a brother is born to help in time of need. -Proverbs 17:7, NLT A blessing in disguise with cheating revelation is how that awful news exposes ones true friends verses erstwhile “friends.” I am SOOOO grateful for the many friends who passed that fire-test. These are people who stood … Continue reading “Friends post adultery revelation”
“Let’s talk about YOUR sins,” says cheater apologist.
“It doesn’t matter what she did. Let’s talk about YOUR sins.” – Cheater Apologist This sort of response is the very definition of dismissive. It has all the appearance of godliness without the substance. Of course, adultery–i.e. the victimization of faithful spouses–matters to God! When someone responds by being dismissive of adultery or infidelity, it is … Continue reading ““Let’s talk about YOUR sins,” says cheater apologist.”
Not nice Jesus words!
Did you know Jesus called his religious “opponents” names?! He called them out as “hypocrites,” “blind guides,” and “fools” (see Mt 23:13-39). Do those names sound like “blessings” and not curses? Or do they sound like a frank, truthful labeling of bad behaviors? I have little patience for religious people who sit in judgment over … Continue reading “Not nice Jesus words!”
Cheater-Speak: “I didn’t tell you because…”
“I didn’t tell you, because I thought you’d get angry.” -Cheater Let’s start to unpack this “gem” of a cheater-speak: 1. The cheater is aware that what he or she did might be upsetting to the faithful spouse, yet still did it. This is another reason why I am in the camp that cheaters have full knowledge … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I didn’t tell you because…””
The destructive path
You can rationalize it all you want and justify the path of error you have chosen, but you’ll find out in the end that you took the road to destruction. -Proverbs 14:12, TPT “I have to follow my heart,” says the cheater. “God would want me to be happy,” says the cheater. “I have to … Continue reading “The destructive path”
Grateful God Condemns Adultery
God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4b, NLT God is love…. -I John 4:16b, KJV If God does not condemn anything, can God real be loving? I do not think so. That is why I am grateful God does condemn adultery as evil (see Deut. 22:22). Such condemnation is … Continue reading “Grateful God Condemns Adultery”
No marriage left to save as long as still cheating!
Public Service Notice: As long as the cheater is still cheating, you do not have a marriage to save. You cannot fix this situation on your own. No matter how much you want to stay married. That is all you will do. You will stay attached to your abuser. What you won’t have is a … Continue reading “No marriage left to save as long as still cheating!”