Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies. -Proverbs 31:10, KJV Today is our wedding anniversary. Mrs. DM and I have been married six years. The length of our marriage soon will eclipse the length of my first stormy one. The irony of this proverb is how I had the … Continue reading “Tale of Two 6th Anniversaries”
Author: Divorce Minister
Competing against a fantasy
May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. -Proverbs 5:18, NIV When I was dating my first wife (the cheater), I remember thinking about this dynamic. A committed relationship was very different than one that was not. The fantasy soon wears off when real life issues start impacting … Continue reading “Competing against a fantasy”
Cheater claims no hope.
“I just do not have any hope for our marriage.” -Cheater Ironically, faithful spouses are usually the ones who are accused of giving up on the marriage. The reality is that the cheater gave up on the marriage the moment they decided to violate their marriage vows. Plus, many of us–I suspect–sat in the counseling … Continue reading “Cheater claims no hope.”
Do not just stay daytime friends!
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. -Proverbs 4:23, NLT I was listening to some of the Kenny Rogers’ songs. He died recently. One of his songs jumped out at me. His song, “Daytime Friends,” struck me as a song that illustrates a most basic principle regarding cheaters: … Continue reading “Do not just stay daytime friends!”
Inquiring Christian: Have you forgiven your ex?
“Have you forgiven your ex-wife?” -Inquiring Christian Let’s assume this person has not already passed judgment and condemned you as “bitter.” In other words, they are asking this question in good faith and out of genuine love for you. My response would be: What do you mean by “forgiven?” The answer to this question will … Continue reading “Inquiring Christian: Have you forgiven your ex?”
Probably planned this out….
There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes…. -Proverbs 6:16-18a, NIV Sad to say, I suspect many cheaters have planned out their deception and their exodus from the marriage. This is especially true–I suspect–when it comes … Continue reading “Probably planned this out….”
Spurned Love
“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” -Matthew 23:37, NIV Spurned love. I do not believe a faithful spouse never loved their cheater. We did. … Continue reading “Spurned Love”
Mailbag: Justifying adultery using Proverbs 6:30?
Dear DM, I’m wondering what your take is on Proverbs 6:30 ? Some who read the Bible thru the lens of their sexuality would use this verse as justification for committing adultery. -Michelle Dear Michelle, Well, let’s first look at what that verse says, “Men do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy … Continue reading “Mailbag: Justifying adultery using Proverbs 6:30?”
Stuck relationships
If a man be found lying with a woman married to an husband, then they shall both of them die, both the man that lay with the woman, and the woman: so shalt thou put away evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, KJV Sometimes we cling to other unhealthy relationships besides the relationship with our cheater. … Continue reading “Stuck relationships”
Divorce Minister is back!!!
I’m back. Thanks for your understanding regarding the break. So much is happening right now with my move regarding my day job. So, I might occasionally have to hit pause on my daily postings. But I will return… I know how much it means to have a daily reminder of support when going through infidelity … Continue reading “Divorce Minister is back!!!”