“My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?” -Matthew 27:46b, KJV When I was struggling the most, these words from Jesus brought me the greatest comfort. They were reminders to me that God understood the pain and suffering that I was enduring. He could relate. Jesus understands what it meant to suffer unjustly. Jesus understands … Continue reading “My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?”
Author: Divorce Minister
Two Practical Strategies for Peace
“…and the truth shall make you free.” -John 8:32b, KJV Two Practical Strategies for Peace When I was recovering from my divorce from my cheater, two particular strategies helped me the most. 1. Identify the “handles,” “triggers,” or otherwise unwanted labels/identities that you vehemently are trying to avoid. An effective manipulator is able to hone … Continue reading “Two Practical Strategies for Peace”
Divorce Minister’s Take On the Ethics of AAMFT
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Divorce Minister’s Take On the Ethics of AAMFT For those who are unfamiliar, the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy (AAMFT) is a–if not THE— major professional association for marriage therapists in the United States. You can read their ethics statement by clicking (here). Today’s post … Continue reading “Divorce Minister’s Take On the Ethics of AAMFT”
About Comments on this Blog
Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. -Ephesians 4:29, NLT This blog is designed a safe place for faithful spouses to come for support and pastoral guidance from a pastor who has “been there.” … Continue reading “About Comments on this Blog”
The Tragedy of the Ending
The LORD said to Samuel, “How long will you mourn for Saul, since I have rejected him as king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil and be on your way….” -I Samuel 16:1a, NIV The Tragedy of the Ending Just because we have accepted the end of the marriage due to the adultery does … Continue reading “The Tragedy of the Ending”
Alcohol and Cheaters
You know the song: “Love and Marriage?” As it applies to infidelity from what I hear and know, I think it could be rewritten with the lyrics… “Booze and cheating, booze and cheating…” Alcohol can impair judgment. But I do not buy the cheater excuse that the “alcohol made me do it.” They never ought … Continue reading “Alcohol and Cheaters”
Engage in empathy to avoid errors
“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” -Matthew 7:12, NLT Engage in Empathy to Avoid Errors So many of the pastoral care errors I encountered and have heard about could be avoided if those pastors … Continue reading “Engage in empathy to avoid errors”
Mailbag: DM, Please help me!
Dear Divorce Minister, Please help me! I feel destroyed by my husband and his parents. 3 months into our marriage I discovered he was a porn addict. At first he expressed regret, but as time went on and the porn continued, he started getting angry with me when I tried to confront him. We’ve been … Continue reading “Mailbag: DM, Please help me!”
3 Things You Need To Know About Adultery
-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “3 Things You Need To Know About Adultery”
A Toxic Mark Driscoll Teaching Regarding Headship
“Let’s say, for example, there’s a daughter, and she’s got a close relationship with her covenant head Christian dad. That headship protects her from other boys who want to come along and be her head, tell her what to do, set an identity for her, abuse her, endanger her. It protects her from other young … Continue reading “A Toxic Mark Driscoll Teaching Regarding Headship”