Recently, I was driving to a friend’s house and feeling a little sad. Initially, I could not put my finger on what was putting me in the funk. Then I realized… …it was my “trauma-versary!” A little over a decade ago, my (now) ex-wife called and confirmed my worst suspicions. She had–indeed–been sexually active with … Continue reading “Grief Surprise”
Author: Divorce Minister
Give thanks ALWAYS!
16 Always be joyful. 17 Never stop praying. 18 Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. -I Thessalonians 5:16-18, NLT When going through infidelity discovery and divorce, it is too easy to focus on what we have lost and the injustice of it all. We start losing sight of what … Continue reading “Give thanks ALWAYS!”
Preach naked and only then will I consider following Hosea’s example!
…the Lord told Isaiah son of Amoz, “Take off the burlap you have been wearing, and remove your sandals.” Isaiah did as he was told and walked around naked and barefoot. Then the Lord said, “My servant Isaiah has been walking around naked and barefoot for the last three years.” -Isaiah 20:2-3a, NLT To the pastor insisting … Continue reading “Preach naked and only then will I consider following Hosea’s example!”
Quick test of “professionals”
Question: Do you believe cheating is abuse? Anything less than an unequivocal “Yes” is a sign that this professional will attempt to blame you for the cheating. They will engage in some version of “The Shared Responsibility Lie“–namely, you are partially or fully to blame for the cheating. It is a simple test: one question. … Continue reading “Quick test of “professionals””
An “innocent party” in divorce?
Is there such thing as an “innocent party” in a divorce? Yes. I struggled with this question when fighting to retain my minister’s license years ago. Psycho-babble (and evil along with it) is winning when we cannot identify or distinguish between the innocent party and the perpetrator. Now, I understand those who say we all … Continue reading “An “innocent party” in divorce?”
Technical Website Issues Resolved – We think!
The last few days the website with experiencing some difficulties. I apologize for that. One of my “plugins” was misbehaving. Thanks to some expert help, we are back up and running! The links should now populate and work.
You do NOT owe them agreement!
While an abusive cheater may act otherwise, he or she is NOT entitled to your agreement. They might want you to agree to a blasé narrative about why you are divorcing absent all mention of their marriage-ending sin. They might want you to agree to never bring up the cheater partner. They might want you … Continue reading “You do NOT owe them agreement!”
Thoughts On IHOPKC ELT’s Initial Findings Re:Mike Bickle Allegations
“After three weeks of examination, IHOPKC has identified five of eight alleged victims. Three of those five have publicly called the allegations lies, a fourth has not wanted to communicate with IHOPKC’s attorney, and the fifth’s allegations relate to incidents that preceded IHOPKC’s founding. Further, it became apparent that the Complaint Group did not have … Continue reading “Thoughts On IHOPKC ELT’s Initial Findings Re:Mike Bickle Allegations”
Hymn Encouragement: Truth About Fiery Trials
“When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie, My grace, all-sufficient, shall be thy supply. The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine.” -“How Firm a Foundation” (Public Domain) Discovering a spouse’s infidelity certainly qualifies as a “fiery trial!” I love the following line about … Continue reading “Hymn Encouragement: Truth About Fiery Trials”
On “brutal honesty”
With their mouths the godless destroy their neighbors, but through knowledge the righteous escape. -Proverbs 11:9, NIV Ever notice how an excuse for acting with cruelty is often couched with the virtue word of “honesty?” The cheater might talk about just being “brutally honest” where the reality is that they are just “brutal” in the … Continue reading “On “brutal honesty””