Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?

Dear DM, Thank you for your blog and the articles in there. I recently stumbled across your blog because 2 weeks ago I discovered my husband having an affair (he has been having an affair for 4 months and only confessed because he got found out. If I had not found out it would have gone … Continue reading “Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?”

Fall From Grace: Ravi Zacharias and Clergy Sexual Abuse

Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife…. -1 Timothy 3:2a, NIV Growing up, I admired the late Ravi Zacharias as an intellectual hero of the Christian faith. In high school and my undergraduate years, I would regularly listen to his radio broadcasts as he presented a “brainy” Christianity. For someone … Continue reading “Fall From Grace: Ravi Zacharias and Clergy Sexual Abuse”

God protects us!

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. -Psalm 46:1, KJV I am enjoying the new album put out by Kim Walker-Smith. There’s a song, “Protector,” about God protecting and holding us. It is one my favorites. Enjoy:  

Triggering phrase: “Open and honest”

“We need to have open and honest communication,” says Cheater. When I hear the phrase “open and honest,” I am slightly triggered. It sends me back to the conflict with my ex-wife as our marriage ended.  The words aren’t bad in and of themselves. Such a goal for communication is admirable. We want to be … Continue reading “Triggering phrase: “Open and honest””

Cheaters not behaving as if married

But the way of the wicked is like deep darkness; they do not know what makes them stumble. -Proverbs 4:19, NIV A common theme of stories with cheaters is how they exploit faithful spouse trust. One of those ways is to take advantage of the faithful spouse’s trust that they would not behave in ways … Continue reading “Cheaters not behaving as if married”

Cheater-Speak: “We were married too young.”

“We just married too young. That’s why it didn’t work out.” -Cheater I just do not buy the “married too young” explanation for divorce. It is an excuse. This is a tidy lie to cover up for the cheater’s character deficits and to help people avoid feeling uncomfortable in facing the hard truth: The cheater … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “We were married too young.””

Will you allow Satan drive you away or will you run towards God?

His wife said, “Still holding on to your precious integrity, are you? Curse God and be done with it!” -Job 2:9, MSG When the calamity of infidelity discovery strikes, we have two option: 1) Allow the sins of “man” drive us away from God with a curse. Or 2) Run to God as our only … Continue reading “Will you allow Satan drive you away or will you run towards God?”

Public Service Announcement: Cheating is abuse!!!

Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! – I Corinthians 6:15b, NLT When someone is a cheater, they are also an abuser. You cannot have one without the other. Soul rape is abusive. I am astounded by how cheating and adultery are too often treated … Continue reading “Public Service Announcement: Cheating is abuse!!!”