“Naked I came from my mother’s womb, and naked I will depart.The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” -Job 1:21b, NIV We can cause all sorts of suffering for ourselves if we approach our losses with a sense of entitlement. What do I mean? I am talking about those implicit contracts we “made” … Continue reading “Grief, Gratitude, and Entitlement”
DM channeling comfort
3 Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; 4 Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God. -2 Corinthians 1:3-4, KJV … Continue reading “DM channeling comfort”
A song to encourage
Now if we be dead with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with him…. -Romans 6:8, KJV We know that Jesus is the embodiment of God’s love for you and me. It is through His sacrificial love on the Cross that we are set free from slavery to fear, performance, and perfectionism. He … Continue reading “A song to encourage”
Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?”
And he [God] said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” -Genesis 22:2, KJV “Maybe God is asking me to sacrifice my marriage like … Continue reading “Cheater: “Maybe God wants me to sacrifice my marriage like Isaac?””
Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!
***Marriage is not a happy-making contract!*** The seemingly accepted “wisdom” on dealing with infidelity–especially emotional affairs–is to look to the marriage relationship for what was “missing.” In other words, why was the cheater unhappy? Besides being predicated on a sociologically proven false premise–i.e. cheaters only cheat when they are unhappy in their marriages (see Dr. … Continue reading “Happy-Maker, Spouse is not!”
Cheater-Speak: “Open and Honest”
“I have to be open and honest.” -Cheater This is a manipulation game for the unaware. A cheater seeking “openness” from a faithful spouse is really asking for them to show all their cards while the cheater holds their own close to the chest. It is a plea for one-sided disclosure. Openness is not the … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “Open and Honest””
Surreal and temporary
The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever. -I John 2:17, NIV The other day I was back in my home town. It was surreal driving through the streets where I grew up. Seeing buildings where only trees or fields existed created a surreal sensation in me. The crazy … Continue reading “Surreal and temporary”
Forgiveness does not alter historical facts.
It still feels strange for me to even speak about how my first marriage ended. I feel internal pressure and accusation as if speaking the facts means I have not forgiven her or am bitter. That’s a lie, by the way. But it is a hard one to shake growing up amidst a Christian … Continue reading “Forgiveness does not alter historical facts.”
Releasing Peace
” ‘When you enter a house, first say, ‘Peace to this house.’ If someone who promotes peace is there, your peace will rest on them; if not, it will return to you.’” -Luke 10:5-6, NIV Releasing peace is powerful spiritual warfare. This something I learned from a sermon I heard from Pastor Jamey VanGelder at The … Continue reading “Releasing Peace”
Cheater defenses
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Be prepared for the cheater to give every excuse as to why what they did wasn’t “that bad.” I think that is all about their own defenses. It comes back to their own image management where they are unwilling to face reality because that would tarnish their … Continue reading “Cheater defenses”