“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’”
-Proverbs 30:20, NIV
Cheaters do not need reminders of their specialness.
They need reminders that they are accountable for their sinful behavior. A godly pastor will keep this in mind when dealing with a cheater.
The last thing the spiritual health of a cheater needs is another person to give them a “pass” for their sinful behaviors.
That is how the cheating happened–namely, the cheater thought they got a pass to cheat. They thought this was a special case.
The idea they get a pass to cheat is the lie that needs attacking. They need to know that sin is sin. Cheaters are not special in that way. They will be held accountable for their sins one day (see 2 Corinthians 5:10).
The very last thing a cheater needs is a pastor blaming a faithful spouse or encouraging that spouse to remind the cheater how special they are.
Sadly, that is the usual advice given by pastors to devastated faithful spouses.
The cheater already “knows” he or she is special. That is why they think they can get away with violating their spouse and vows to God in their marriage.
