Faithful spouse, remember who made this mess! If you are like many of us, you will be tempted to take on responsibility for fixing the relationship blown up by your partner’s infidelity. Please, don’t! The only way the relationship can be repaired is by the person who blew it up in the first place. Sadly, … Continue reading “Remember who made the mess!”
Category: Emotional Affair
Poor, sinful choices.
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4, NLT Adultery is a culmination of sinful choices. I think it is important to understand that we are not dealing with one sin alone when it comes to … Continue reading “Poor, sinful choices.”
Believe it. THAT devious!
The LORD detests lying lips, but he delights in those who tell the truth. -Proverbs 12:22, NLT Yes, THAT devious! I doubt I am the only one who struggled to believe my (now) ex-wife was that devious. It is kind of baked into a healthy marriage that we give each other the benefit of the … Continue reading “Believe it. THAT devious!”
PSA: Partial truths = lies
So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. -Ephesians 4:25, NLT Public Service Announcement: Partial Truths Are Fully Lies! This is a very common tactic of caught cheaters. They will confess to the point where the evidence would make them look ridiculous but … Continue reading “PSA: Partial truths = lies”
Will be found out!
But if you fail to keep your word, then you will have sinned against the LORD, and you may be sure that your sin will find you out. -Numbers 32:23, NLT (emphasis mine) What amazes me is how cheaters seem to believe their sins and treachery are beyond discovery by faithful spouses! To be fair, … Continue reading “Will be found out!”
Fact: Cheaters flunked marriage.
“You shall not commit adultery.” -Exodus 20:14, NIV (from The Ten Commandments) Fact: Cheaters are marriage flunkies. One of the most basic lessons in Christian marriage is adhering to this classic and consistent prohibition regarding sex with marriage outsiders. Cheaters have–spectacularly, in some cases–flunked this most basic of marriage lessons. Yet for some reason, … Continue reading “Fact: Cheaters flunked marriage.”
Beware of sand foundations!
But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. -Matthew 7:26, NLT We all know it is a sand foundation. This is the truth of trying to rebuild a marriage with the infidelity left unaddressed or treated as a “minor” problem. The marriage … Continue reading “Beware of sand foundations!”
Disconnected Professions
Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” -Malachi 2:13-14a, NIV The disconnect between what some “Christians” say and do is astounding: -A cheater apologist can talk about righteous living while turning a … Continue reading “Disconnected Professions”
“What about their soul?”
“What about their soul? You could win them back by how you respond,” says well-meaning, naive Christian. This burden is unfair. There is enough pressure on faithful spouses. They don’t need more spiritual shaming. Faithful spouses are Jesus. They do not save souls. Only Jesus can do this. It is spiritually unhealthy to suggest otherwise. Just … Continue reading ““What about their soul?””
Have to choose!
After discovering an inappropriate relationship, a strong indicator over the repentant nature of the cheater is how they handle that relationship going forward. They must choose: Is their marriage more important than this fantasy-fling or is this illicit relationship more important to them? A cheater who stays “friends” with their affair partner is telling faithful … Continue reading “Have to choose!”