And Joseph her husband, being a righteous man and not wanting to disgrace her, planned [to divorce her] secretly.
-Matthew 1:19, NASB (footnoted alternate translation used in brackets)
Do we consider a rape victim “hurt and vengeful” for choosing to have her rapist prosecuted for his crime?
I wouldn’t. It is a matter of justice and may be necessary in order to protect the victim and the general population from this predator.
Similarly, I fail to see why people treat faithful spouses who divorce their cheater or advocate such divorce as necessarily hurt and vengeful.
Adultery is soul rape, after all. By divorcing, they are ending a relationship that was abusive to their souls.
Divorce is a reasonable, just consequence to assume when it comes to dealing with a willful abuser of the covenant and covenant partner.
I quote from Matthew 1:19 to remind everyone that biblically divorce was treated as an act by a righteous Jew upon discovering a wife impregnated by another.
Sadly, we have drifted so far from this biblical assumption of righteousness to impute evil motives to divorcing faithful spouses who justly and simply are distancing themselves from the wickedness of the adulterous partner by divorcing them.
And those making those assumptions of divorced or divorcing faithful spouses are so deceived that they think God supports their denigrating position.