His wife said to him, “Are you still trying to be godly when God has done all this to you? Curse him and die.” – Job 2:19, TLB This is really tempting advice to take when the bottom has fallen out of one’s life.*** *** If you have a suicide plan and means, please seek … Continue reading “Job Didn’t Always Feel The Love Either…”
Category: Trauma of adultery
That Ick Feeling
Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. – Ephesians 5:11-12, NIV When I share about this blog with others, I am sometimes met with interesting reactions. One reaction I’ve got was a “Why would you blog … Continue reading “That Ick Feeling”
Tactics In Discrediting Faithful Spouses
When I was doing my first unit of Clinical Pastoral Education (CPE), I was blessed with some amazing classmates. We worked together learning about ourselves as well as how to bring quality pastoral care to those hurting at a Trauma One center in Hartford, CT. This unit took place while I was separated from my … Continue reading “Tactics In Discrediting Faithful Spouses”
Divorce As Moral Injury
While doing my year-long residency as a chaplain at a Veterans’ Affairs Medical Center, I gained education on a relatively new area of research and work for professional chaplains and psychologists working especially with combat veterans. Most people today are familiar with the acronym PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), but I would be surprised if many … Continue reading “Divorce As Moral Injury”
When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….
When divorce is treated as always unacceptable by Christian leaders… anything else is acceptable. -Lying is acceptable. -Stealing is acceptable. -Physical abuse is acceptable. -Emotional belittling and vitriolic diatribes against a spouse and the kids is acceptable. -Adultery is acceptable. In short, any sort of sin that you can imagine is acceptable. As long as the goal … Continue reading “When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….”
How An Evangelical Seminary Professor Viewed Adultery
These past few weeks I’ve been critiquing an old book by Dr. J. Carl Laney entitled The Divorce Myth: A Biblical Examination of Divorce and Remarriage. I am spending a great deal of time tackling this book not so much as I believe it is a seminal piece of literature on the matter. My point … Continue reading “How An Evangelical Seminary Professor Viewed Adultery”
More Madness From Dr. Laney
In a sense there is no “innocent” or “guilty” party in a marital break-up. It takes two to make a marriage and it usually takes two to make a divorce. While one partner may be the major contributor to the difficulties, it is hard for me to designate the other partner “innocent.” Did that spouse … Continue reading “More Madness From Dr. Laney”
Emptying Words Of Goodness
And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light. It is not surprising, then, if his servants also masquerade as servants of righteousness. Their end will be what their actions deserve. – 2 Corinthians 11:14-15, NIV It is hard to make sense of a experience when the words and actions do not … Continue reading “Emptying Words Of Goodness”
“I felt like a used tissue paper.”
“I felt like a used piece of tissue paper. Just thrown away in the trash.” – Vineyard pastor. The quote might not be exact. However, I will never forget the idea. This brave pastoral spouse shared to a young Vineyard Church about her experience of being sexually assaulted. She vividly described how she felt the next … Continue reading ““I felt like a used tissue paper.””
Relax And Be Still
“Be still, and know that I am God!” – Psalm 46:10a, NLT When I was in the shock stage, I often found myself drawing a warm bath with lavender bath salts to ease my stress. I would play worship music to encourage my soul as I soaked in the tub before or after I went … Continue reading “Relax And Be Still”