We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. -2 Corinthians 4:8-9, NIV An amazing thing about Christianity is how God takes us as damaged creatures and transforms us into beautiful vessels for His glory. It isn’t disqualifying to have had a rough experience in … Continue reading “Damaged but NOT Damaged Goods!”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Emotional healing takes great time.
Probably the hardest part of healing from a divorce from a cheater are the lingering emotional wounds from that marriage. You have to find a way to ground yourself in reality. The truth is what will set you free from the cheater’s lies about you and your marriage. In other words, this reality is a … Continue reading “Emotional healing takes great time.”
On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce
“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT What astounds me with pastors and Christian marriage counselors who deal with marital infidelity situations is how too many treat cheating as incidental to a marriage ending in … Continue reading “On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce”
I testify to God’s faithfulness.
And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness….” -Exodus 34:6, NIV When I was going through my divorce from my cheater, the future looked extremely bleak on the employment front for me. I was SOOO close to giving up on … Continue reading “I testify to God’s faithfulness.”
Season for divorce, too?
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT Do we really believe this Bible verse? If we do, I suggest “everything” includes a time for divorce. It may not be the best of all options–just as making war is not better than peace–yet like war, it … Continue reading “Season for divorce, too?”
Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!
Christian leaders seem to worry that allowing any divorce is to open the flood gates to every divorce. The idea is permitting divorce necessarily means taking a disposable stance towards the covenant of marriage. This is just not so. God does not take marriage lightly, and yet He is described in the Bible as divorcing Israel: And I saw, … Continue reading “Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!”
PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad. -2 Corinthians 5:10, KJV Repenting of sins committed against us makes no sense! Yet this is the standard counsel given to … Continue reading “PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!”
Marriage pressures and adultery
For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders…. -Mark 7:21, KJV When the Jesus talks about sin here, he is very clear about its origin. Sin proceeds–i.e. originates–from the heart of the sinner. This is basic theology. I am saddened by how so many pastors and Christian counselors … Continue reading “Marriage pressures and adultery”
Goal of peace
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. -Romans 12:18, NIV Notice what this verse does and does NOT say: 1. It does NOT say–or set the expectation–that we are friends with everyone. 2. It DOES say–i.e. acknowledges–that peace with some people is impossible. These are very important … Continue reading “Goal of peace”
No bitterness AND justice
The soul that sinneth, it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon him. -Ezekiel 18:20, KJV Some Christians think talking about “your … Continue reading “No bitterness AND justice”