He was despised and rejected by men, a man of deep sorrows who was no stranger to suffering and grief. We hid our faces from him in disgust and considered him a nobody, not worthy of respect. -Isaiah 53:3, TPT During this Holy Week, I think it important to write a reminder about Jesus. This is a … Continue reading “Misjudged Jesus “gets it!””
Category: Trauma of adultery
Never did call his number
I discovered many calls and texts between my (now) ex-wife and her adultery partner. They were at all times of the day and night. One of my counselors asked if I was interested in calling the Other Man (OM). I really was not interested. Looking back, I think I did not want to engage this … Continue reading “Never did call his number”
Seemed to start good…
Most of the crowd spread their garments on the road ahead of him, and others cut branches from the trees and spread them on the road. -Matthew 21:8, NLT When we married, we likely had no idea our marriage would end the way it did. It was a happy day. Sure, the saying goes that … Continue reading “Seemed to start good…”
Those things (former) in-laws say…
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord. -Ephesians 6:4, NLT Show of–virtual–hands, how many had in-laws who lectured you about your deficiencies as a spouse? If you are looking for the source of blinding … Continue reading “Those things (former) in-laws say…”
Competing against a fantasy
May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. -Proverbs 5:18, NIV When I was dating my first wife (the cheater), I remember thinking about this dynamic. A committed relationship was very different than one that was not. The fantasy soon wears off when real life issues start impacting … Continue reading “Competing against a fantasy”
Cheater claims no hope.
“I just do not have any hope for our marriage.” -Cheater Ironically, faithful spouses are usually the ones who are accused of giving up on the marriage. The reality is that the cheater gave up on the marriage the moment they decided to violate their marriage vows. Plus, many of us–I suspect–sat in the counseling … Continue reading “Cheater claims no hope.”
Do not just stay daytime friends!
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. -Proverbs 4:23, NLT I was listening to some of the Kenny Rogers’ songs. He died recently. One of his songs jumped out at me. His song, “Daytime Friends,” struck me as a song that illustrates a most basic principle regarding cheaters: … Continue reading “Do not just stay daytime friends!”
Probably planned this out….
There are six things the Lord hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes…. -Proverbs 6:16-18a, NIV Sad to say, I suspect many cheaters have planned out their deception and their exodus from the marriage. This is especially true–I suspect–when it comes … Continue reading “Probably planned this out….”
Spurned Love
“Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, and you were not willing.” -Matthew 23:37, NIV Spurned love. I do not believe a faithful spouse never loved their cheater. We did. … Continue reading “Spurned Love”
Mailbag: Justifying adultery using Proverbs 6:30?
Dear DM, I’m wondering what your take is on Proverbs 6:30 ? Some who read the Bible thru the lens of their sexuality would use this verse as justification for committing adultery. -Michelle Dear Michelle, Well, let’s first look at what that verse says, “Men do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy … Continue reading “Mailbag: Justifying adultery using Proverbs 6:30?”