Category: Cheating

Cheating is abuse. It is not morally neutral behavior.

Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! – I Corinthians 6:15b, NLT When someone is a cheater, they are also an abuser. You cannot have one without the other. Soul rape is abusive. I am astounded by how cheating and adultery are too often treated … Continue reading “Cheating is abuse. It is not morally neutral behavior.”

Inquiring Mind: Did you love her?

“Did you ever love her?”  OR “Did you ever love him?” This is such a simply stated question. However, it is far from simple when applied to a cheater. Looking back on the marriage and how it ended, it is complicated. How can you say you ever loved someone who revealed they were utterly different … Continue reading “Inquiring Mind: Did you love her?”

God looks upon the heart – Parable of Unforgiving Servant

32 Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ -Matthew 18:32-33, NLT A big struggle with us, faithful spouse, surrounds the topic of forgiveness. … Continue reading “God looks upon the heart – Parable of Unforgiving Servant”

Repentance is not concerned with image

Cheaters are often more worried about what people think about them than what they actually did. This is the reason that they are so upset when faithful spouses dare tell others about their adultery. Such revelations make them look bad. It is hard to spin committing adultery in a positive light–especially in a Christian community. (Albeit, some … Continue reading “Repentance is not concerned with image”

An intentional marriage torching

Some cheaters know their faithful spouse will give them unending, second chances. So, they set up a system to torch the marriage. These are the haughty cheater types. They think they are the prize and the faithful spouse must demonstrate their worthiness. Such pride is at the root of their sinfully wicked hearts. They abuse … Continue reading “An intentional marriage torching”

Cheater-Speak: “Open and honest” ploy

“Why can’t you just be open and honest with me?! I am being completely open and honest with you,” says a lying cheater in a marriage session. Openness and honesty is a noble attribute of healthy relationships. That is what makes this cheater plea so dangerous. It looks good to an outsider. Who is against openness … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “Open and honest” ploy”

Flunking Basic Christianity

The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,” and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” Love does no harm to a neighbor. -Romans 13:9-10a, NIV Cheaters have been known to profess their commitment to Christianity … Continue reading “Flunking Basic Christianity”

Just because a cheater says they are a Christian does not make it so!

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.” -Matthew 7:21, NIV Confessing “Christian” Cheaters One of the most confusing part of dealing with adultery and general infidelity discoveries is how they do not fit with the … Continue reading “Just because a cheater says they are a Christian does not make it so!”

Reconciliation, NOT Restoration

And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. – 2 Corinthians 5:19b, NIV Reconciled to friendship, NOT marriage! What often bothers me about Christians talking about marriages ravaged by adultery is how “reconciliation” is thrown about as the same thing as marriage restoration. It is not. A former couple could experience true reconciliation … Continue reading “Reconciliation, NOT Restoration”