Dear Divorce Minister, Five years later, and I’m still numb or in an fog or angry/depressed. I was pregnant with our third child when my husband met a woman on an online game. The gist of it is that she started out “fun and flirty” and then they proceeded to talk about more deep stuff. … Continue reading “Dear DM, This sucks.”
Category: Emotional Affair
Most Reasonable of Expectations
“…let her therefore put away her whoredoms out of her sight, and her adulteries from between her breasts….” -Hosea 2:2b, KJV A Faithful Spouse’s Reasonable Expectation: The cheater ends the affair(s)–both physical and emotional varieties–and engages in actions demonstrating self-work on the character flaws that led the cheater to betray their partner. This expectation needs … Continue reading “Most Reasonable of Expectations”
Awful book published by Focus on the Family(TM) on infidelity
How God Used “the Other Woman”: Saving Your Marriage after Infidelity by Tina Konkin I was shocked and saddened by the recent publication of this book (July 9, 2019) by a source that helped me during my ordeal with an unfaithful spouse. The book description is so awful; I have no plans to buy the … Continue reading “Awful book published by Focus on the Family(TM) on infidelity”
“Bad Christian.” Ok.
“You’re a ‘bad Christian’ for not doing ….” -Cheater This shaming label used to make me jump to do my ex and others’ bidding. I did not want to be seen as a “bad Christian.” Then I wised up to the source. Is an unrepentant adulteress really qualified to wield such a label? Really?! I … Continue reading ““Bad Christian.” Ok.”
Other people can be wrong. Let them!
Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! -Isaiah 5:20, KJV Part of the injustice faithful spouses often experience is a community of people–even confessing Christians–who will not accept what happened. Some might even accept … Continue reading “Other people can be wrong. Let them!”
Mismatched values as in light and darkness
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14, KJV Whether one is abandoned or cheated on or both, the reality for faithful spouses is as stark as this verse from 2 Corinthians paints it. Light cannot fellowship with … Continue reading “Mismatched values as in light and darkness”
The proper biblical label of adultery is “evil!”
“If a man is discovered committing adultery, both he and the woman must die. In this way, you will purge Israel of such evil.” -Deuteronomy 22:22, NLT What Christians need to understand is that adultery is truly evil! This is not “second fiddle” to divorce. Adultery is the main event in the evil performance. This … Continue reading “The proper biblical label of adultery is “evil!””
Tantrums and cheater unhappiness
When a cheater is told “No,” they will likely get angry. They may even engage in a toddler tantrum. That is about their maturity level after all. An important lesson for faithful spouses to learn is how we are not responsible for how our cheater feels. We are responsible for our own emotions and actions … Continue reading “Tantrums and cheater unhappiness”
Awful Advice: “Don’t throw away your marriage over this!”
“‘If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death.’” -Leviticus 20:10, NIV “Don’t throw away your marriage over this,” the well-meaning pastor tells the sobbing faithful spouse upon discovery of the adulterous double life of their spouse. He misses … Continue reading “Awful Advice: “Don’t throw away your marriage over this!””
Rejection happened to Jesus, too!
O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not! -Matthew 23:37, KJV What did Jesus do that “made” Jerusalem reject him? Nothing. The point of this is to highlight … Continue reading “Rejection happened to Jesus, too!”