“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT What astounds me with pastors and Christian marriage counselors who deal with marital infidelity situations is how too many treat cheating as incidental to a marriage ending in … Continue reading “On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce”
Category: Emotional Affair
Season for divorce, too?
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT Do we really believe this Bible verse? If we do, I suggest “everything” includes a time for divorce. It may not be the best of all options–just as making war is not better than peace–yet like war, it … Continue reading “Season for divorce, too?”
Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!
Christian leaders seem to worry that allowing any divorce is to open the flood gates to every divorce. The idea is permitting divorce necessarily means taking a disposable stance towards the covenant of marriage. This is just not so. God does not take marriage lightly, and yet He is described in the Bible as divorcing Israel: And I saw, … Continue reading “Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!”
PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad. -2 Corinthians 5:10, KJV Repenting of sins committed against us makes no sense! Yet this is the standard counsel given to … Continue reading “PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!”
Marriage pressures and adultery
For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders…. -Mark 7:21, KJV When the Jesus talks about sin here, he is very clear about its origin. Sin proceeds–i.e. originates–from the heart of the sinner. This is basic theology. I am saddened by how so many pastors and Christian counselors … Continue reading “Marriage pressures and adultery”
Goal of peace
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. -Romans 12:18, NIV Notice what this verse does and does NOT say: 1. It does NOT say–or set the expectation–that we are friends with everyone. 2. It DOES say–i.e. acknowledges–that peace with some people is impossible. These are very important … Continue reading “Goal of peace”
No bitterness AND justice
The soul that sinneth, it shall die. The son shall not bear the iniquity of the father, neither shall the father bear the iniquity of the son: the righteousness of the righteous shall be upon him, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon him. -Ezekiel 18:20, KJV Some Christians think talking about “your … Continue reading “No bitterness AND justice”
While expensive, breaking free worth it!
Owe nothing to anyone—except for your obligation to love one another. -Romans 13:8a, NLT When dealing with divorce, you are dealing with a financially devastating situation. It is painful. Maybe you set aside your career for this person? Maybe you are relying on them as you try to find your next job? Maybe you … Continue reading “While expensive, breaking free worth it!”
Stay married for “holiness”? Really?!
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be … Continue reading “Stay married for “holiness”? Really?!”
Labelled the problem?
Anyone else here given a label by a counselor identifying YOU as the marriage problem? This assumes the cheater comes to counseling. Some don’t. A problem with counselors is that some are not up on the games cheaters play. They become complicit in the act of keeping the faithful spouse off the scent of what … Continue reading “Labelled the problem?”