For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. -2 Timothy 1:7, KJV While adultery victims are not less than victims of their cheaters, they are also more. They are FAITHFUL SPOUSES! SURVIVORS. Just because we have been cheated upon does not mean … Continue reading “We can…”
Category: Emotional Affair
Lifestyle of Lies Problem
“You belong to your father, the devil… When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44a,c, NIV When lies become a lifestyle, it is hard to break free of those bad habits. This is why I have such a low estimation of a cheater’s … Continue reading “Lifestyle of Lies Problem”
PSA: Emotional Affairs Are Excluded, Too!
Public Service Announcement: The marriage vow of “forsaking all others” excludes emotional affairs, too! I say this to emphasize the need to take emotional affairs seriously. When a spouse cares more about how a third party partner feels than their own spouse, they are breaking their sacred marriage vows. They have given their heart to … Continue reading “PSA: Emotional Affairs Are Excluded, Too!”
Hold up, now!
“I cheated, but I’m fine now after talking with my individual therapist. We’re here to deal with what drove me to do that,” says manipulative Cheater. Hold up, now! This is the proper response to such a statement. A wise pastor ought to slow down the train and help point out cheating is NOT a … Continue reading “Hold up, now!”
So many bad decisions!
For this command is a lamp, this teaching is a light, and correction and instruction are the way to life, keeping you from your neighbor’s wife, from the smooth talk of a wayward woman. -Proverbs 6:23-24, NIV So many bad decisions! The act of infidelity is often underplayed by cheaters and cheater apologists. They treat … Continue reading “So many bad decisions!”
She would never… but she did.
She would never… but she did. No one enjoys learning that they were wrong about someone in a horrible way. The sick feeling of learning that you’ve been played is not one I enjoy, at least. So many of us, faithful spouses, are all too familiar with that feeling, though. We were SO trusting. The … Continue reading “She would never… but she did.”
Not Judge-y Enough!
What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church? Are you not to judge those inside? -I Corinthians 5:12, NIV An excuse made for passivity in the face of an unrepentant cheater in church is how someone does not want to look “judge-y.” This is such shame-based thinking. As such, this leads to … Continue reading “Not Judge-y Enough!”
Stuck via cheater denial
How many were deceived for a longer period of time because your cheater explicitly denied what he or she was doing? “I would never cheat on you.” “You know me better than that. There isn’t another man [or woman] involved.” “We need to focus on your problems. Don’t worry about me. I wouldn’t cheat on … Continue reading “Stuck via cheater denial”
Cannot win with a cheater
Often times, you cannot win with a cheater. They will always choose to treat you like you are the problem. Here’s a recently released country song that talks about that:
Taken for granted
Let your wife be a fountain of blessing for you. Rejoice in the wife of your youth. Proverbs 5:18, NLT Cheaters are so quick to forget or devalue what you bring to the marriage. In the discarding phase, they might treat you as worthless. Some might go as far as to claim you bring and … Continue reading “Taken for granted”