27 “You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. -Matthew 5:27-28, NLT Cheating emotionally does not give the unfaithful spouse permission to bash their partner with their pastor. Emotional cheating is sin. … Continue reading “Cheating Emotionally”
Category: Emotional Affair
Comforting words for faithful spouses
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV “Yes, it happened. She cheated on you. And that’s right: you didn’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. Not at all.” You really want to help a faithful spouse? … Continue reading “Comforting words for faithful spouses”
Forgiveness: Do I trust God?
From his temple he heard my voice; my cry came before him, into his ears. The earth trembled and quaked, and the foundations of the mountains shook; they trembled because he was angry. -Psalm 18:6b-7, NIV Can I trust God with my hurt? I think the answer to this question is answering the question of whether or … Continue reading “Forgiveness: Do I trust God?”
Cheater-Speak: “I had unmet emotional needs.”
“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.” -Cheater “I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!” -Cheater Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you. Maybe they will point to you spending too much time … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I had unmet emotional needs.””
Scary divorce.
For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. -I Timothy 6:10, KJV A popular Christian curriculum for people going through divorce would regularly try to dissuade people from divorcing by pointing out the financial … Continue reading “Scary divorce.”
Hate YOUR narrative
All who do evil hate the light and refuse to go near it for fear their sins will be exposed. -John 3:20, NLT Cheaters hate YOUR narrative–aka reality. The last thing they want is to lose control of the narrative. They do not want to look bad even though they did some very bad things. … Continue reading “Hate YOUR narrative”
“I just need a break from our marriage.”
“I’m tired of pretending. I just need a break from our marriage,” says Cheater. “So, you want to pretend you aren’t married when you are? That’s not how our marriage vows work,” replies faithful spouse. Cheaters might ask for “a break” as if your marriage is just an extended period of dating. Such statements reinforce … Continue reading ““I just need a break from our marriage.””
Do not go on the ride
To heal, we have to acknowledge the truth. The sad thing is our cheater may never actually do this. They might engage you in an endless battle over getting you to take responsibility for their abuse of you. That argument is one crazy ride. Refuse to take the bait. While helpful, you do not have … Continue reading “Do not go on the ride”
Pro-Tip: Not talking positive is a sign of discard in progress
When a cheater is done with you, they might refuse to talk about what they enjoy about being married to you. This makes it easier on them both to cheat on you and to discard you. After all, the positives would remind them of real losses that come with the ending of the marriage. Such … Continue reading “Pro-Tip: Not talking positive is a sign of discard in progress”
Cheater speaking…
“I don’t love you anymore.” “I feel like we are just roommates.” “I need space.” Have you heard any of these “gems” come out of your cheater’s mouth? Maybe they spoke such words before you knew they were cheating on you? That would make sense. As these words are designed to hide their dastardly behavior … Continue reading “Cheater speaking…”