See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many. Hebrews 12:15, NIV In order to avoid the discomfort of facing injustice and naming it as such, some Christians turn on faithful spouses calling them “bitter.” They are too spineless to … Continue reading ““Root of bitterness” manipulation”
Category: Grief
When a cheater declines offer to rebuild marriage…
“Even if she cheated on me, I would still stay with her and try to make the marriage work,” says faithful spouse. “You’d just hold that over her head forever,” replies cheater apologist. When this is the mentality or response from the cheater side, you know the marriage is done. This sort of response exposes … Continue reading “When a cheater declines offer to rebuild marriage…”
Does get better!
He brought me forth also into a large place; he delivered me, because he delighted in me. -Psalm 18:19, KJV If you are like me, I wanted everything to just go back to how “it was” in the immediate adultery discovery and divorce. The pain was acute. The loneliness was palatable. The tragedy of a … Continue reading “Does get better!”
Thinking legacy.
And Samuel died; and all the Israelites were gathered together, and lamented him, and buried him in his house at Ramah. -I Samuel 25:1a, KJV When my maternal grandfather died, they shut down his small North Dakotan town to bury him. That’s the sort of impact I hope to have on those around me. I … Continue reading “Thinking legacy.”
Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?
Dear DM, Thank you for your blog and the articles in there. I recently stumbled across your blog because 2 weeks ago I discovered my husband having an affair (he has been having an affair for 4 months and only confessed because he got found out. If I had not found out it would have gone … Continue reading “Mailbag: How long will it take for me to recover?”
DM, Am I going to be broken and defined by this forever?
Hi DM, A follow-up question for you. As a reference – I’m going through a divorce after my spouse entered into another affair (sex addict). During a support group, another person who had also experienced infidelity (who is still with their cheater) said, “This is going to scar you for the rest of your life. … Continue reading “DM, Am I going to be broken and defined by this forever?”
Grief: THAT day!
My tears have been my meat day and night, while they continually say unto me, Where is thy God? -Psalm 42:3, KJV Today is September 11th. I will never forget what happened nineteen years ago on this day while I was a freshman in college. The world changed that day. Two towers were taken down. … Continue reading “Grief: THAT day!”
Jen Hatmaker, famous Christian author and leader, announces her divorce
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. -Psalm 34:18, NIV Keep a close watch on how you live and on your teaching. Stay true to what is right for the sake of your own salvation and the salvation of those who hear you. -I Timothy 4:16, NLT Jen Hatmaker is … Continue reading “Jen Hatmaker, famous Christian author and leader, announces her divorce”
Did you love her?
“Did you ever love her?” OR “Did you ever love him?” This is such a simply stated question. However, it is far from simple when applied to a cheater. Looking back on the marriage and how it ended, it is complicated. How can you say you ever loved someone who revealed they were utterly different … Continue reading “Did you love her?”
Will you let your desert experience steal your song?
His wife said to him, “Are you still maintaining your integrity? Curse God and die!” -Job 2:9, NIV These words were uttered by a woman who had just suffered catastrophic loss with her husband, Job. They had loss their considerable wealth, servants, their children, and even Job’s own health. It was bleak. When faced with great … Continue reading “Will you let your desert experience steal your song?”