Hi DM, I know that my comment would have almost nothing to do with your OG post, but I’ve been really struggling with this and I need your help. I’m a Pentecostal Christian, my wife let me years ago due to infidelity, she had lots of “lovers”, my life has been a mess since then … Continue reading “Dear DM, Are second marriages adulterous?”
Category: Reconciliation
Stopping the sex is NOT enough!
While it is important that the cheating stops, the damage has already been done. Stopping is not the same as repairing. I think this needs to be said. The temptation exists to ignore the damage caused by the cheating as long as “it is over.” Why? The aftermath is not pleasant. It leads to uncomfortable … Continue reading “Stopping the sex is NOT enough!”
Friendly divorce narrative
But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, makes her the victim of adultery, and anyone who marries a divorced woman commits adultery. -Matthew 5:32, NIV “Yeah, we weren’t right for each other. But we are still friends,” says a divorcee. Within Christian circles, the friendly divorce seems to … Continue reading “Friendly divorce narrative”
Recalibrating Expectations: Marriage resurrection is not the norm.
….but the angel said, “Don’t be alarmed. You are looking for Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead! Look, this is where they laid his body.” -Mark 16:6, NLT Resurrection is unexpected. It is not how things normally go. This is in part why Jesus coming back from … Continue reading “Recalibrating Expectations: Marriage resurrection is not the norm.”
Hosea had a special call on his life from God!
When the Lord began to speak by Hosea, the Lord said to Hosea: “Go, take yourself a wife of harlotry And children of harlotry, For the land has committed great harlotry By departing from the Lord.” – Hosea 1:2, NKJV What strikes me as in the last post is how biblically educated men can miss how this was a very special call upon … Continue reading “Hosea had a special call on his life from God!”
Hanging over head
“However, I say to you, if anyone divorces his wife for any reason, except for infidelity, he causes her to commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.” -Matthew 5:32, TPT I do not see an expiration clause here. The permission Jesus gives to divorce a cheater does not come with an exception … Continue reading “Hanging over head”
Silencing of faithful spouses by the Christian community
May all who gloat over my distress be put to shame and confusion; may all who exalt themselves over me be clothed with shame and disgrace. -Psalm 35:25, NIV Churches and church leaders, generally speaking, are not good at giving faithful spouses a voice and reaffirming their agency. At least, that is my experience. What is common … Continue reading “Silencing of faithful spouses by the Christian community”
The Broken Vase Parable
Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been … Continue reading “The Broken Vase Parable”
Advice from a non-therapist…
The following lesson is a lesson I learned the hard way: Be choosy as it comes to who you use as a marriage therapist (if you choose to go that route and the cheater is willing). If the counselor has been your cheater’s individual therapist, they are not suited to help you both as a … Continue reading “Advice from a non-therapist…”
The hellish price for Christian “support”
Hate evil and love what is good; turn your courts into true halls of justice. Perhaps even yet the Lord God of Heaven’s Armies will have mercy on the remnant of his people. -Amos 5:15, NLT Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously is an online community where I do not blame the victims of adultery. Too often, I … Continue reading “The hellish price for Christian “support””