When you’ve been gaslighted once, you can develop a sense for when someone tries to do it, again. Sadly, Cheaters and their supporters are not the only people who engage in gaslighting–i.e. practice of trying to convince you to disregard and distrust your own senses. Politicians and church leaders sadly do this as well. A … Continue reading “Once gaslit…”
Author: Divorce Minister
Always or Never Discard
“You never do anything to contribute to this marriage,” says Cheater. “You always have to do EVERYTHING for you,” says Cheater. Always or Never Discard You may be forgiven if you think what your Cheater is saying is about you. They are attributing behavior to you, after all. However, that is not the point of … Continue reading “Always or Never Discard”
Life Message – All About Connection To God
5 “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. … 9 “I have loved you even as the Father has loved me. Remain in my love.” -John 15:5, 9, NLT We were made to live … Continue reading “Life Message – All About Connection To God”
The pain WILL pass!
My tears have been my food day and night, while people say to me all day long, “Where is your God?” -Psalm 42:3, NIV The pain will pass. I know this is cold comfort in the middle of your pain. It is hard to think of a new world without your spouse and losing everything that … Continue reading “The pain WILL pass!”
Anticipating Loss
Loss is hard. We are currently considering putting down one of our birds. He got attacked by one of our larger birds in a moment when we did not notice the larger bird had made his way towards him. It all happened so suddenly. The injuries apparently are very bad according to the veterinarian that … Continue reading “Anticipating Loss”
Restitution reveals real sorry
Meanwhile, Zacchaeus stood before the Lord and said, “I will give half my wealth to the poor, Lord, and if I have cheated people on their taxes, I will give them back four times as much!” -Luke 19:8, NLT Sorry is a beginning. A true, real sorry is one backed by actions demonstrating an effort … Continue reading “Restitution reveals real sorry”
Thanksgiving! Have a wonderful one!!
Happy Thanksgiving to my faithful spouses in the USA! I know this day may be a tough day for some of you. However, I would encourage both acknowledging those feelings exist AND thinking about what gives you gratitude as part of developing the spiritual discipline of thanksgiving. So, in the spirit of the holiday and … Continue reading “Thanksgiving! Have a wonderful one!!”
Key Repentance
4 Or those eighteen who died when the tower in Siloam fell on them—do you think they were more guilty than all the others living in Jerusalem? 5 I tell you, no! But unless you repent, you too will all perish.” -Luke 13:4-5, NIV Repentance is clearly assumed as necessary before forgiveness and salvation according to Jesus’ own words … Continue reading “Key Repentance”
Marshalling Against You
Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins. -I Peter 4:8, NLT Marshalling Against You Some Cheaters plan out their exit with great forethought. They take advantage of extended family time–like over Thanksgiving holiday–to prepare family to be sympathetic to them during the discard. … Continue reading “Marshalling Against You”
Effort Involved
She hides and waits like a robber, eager to make more men unfaithful. -Proverbs 23:28, NLT For those inclined to believe a cheater is a victim of his or her circumstances, it is worth noting the effort necessary to cover up the infidelity. In fact, I think the aftermath of the cheating is actually the … Continue reading “Effort Involved”