For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. -Matthew 22:30, KJV This verse is very clear. Jesus tells us human marriage does not endure in heaven. Since this is true, spiritual counsel ought to take this into account. The priority ought to … Continue reading “Souls endure, not marriages”
Psychopaths do exist. Wise Christians face this truth.
Christians can be incredibly naive. They want to live in a world where people have adaptive feeling of shame and guilt over wrong-doing. However, not everyone has those buttons. A wise pastor faces this difficult reality: Psychopaths do exist! Part of facing that reality is learning to recognize when one is being “played” by these … Continue reading “Psychopaths do exist. Wise Christians face this truth.”
Anchoring our hearts on truth
Sometimes cheaters will push us off our balance with their confident lies. The antidote to lies is truth. Our journey to healthy spirituality is a journey of growing deeper in our understanding of truth. Truth is reality. Cheaters deal in fiction and lies. Some have been dealing in such worlds so long that they have … Continue reading “Anchoring our hearts on truth”
Cheater not filing, NOT enough!
“A wicked and adulterous generation looks for a sign, but none will be given it except the sign of Jonah.” Jesus then left them and went away. -Matthew 16:4, NIV Some Christian leaders will encourage faithful spouses to stay in marriages if their cheater chooses not to file for divorce. I am NOT one of those! … Continue reading “Cheater not filing, NOT enough!”
DM, Why do they still support the cheater?
Dear Divorce Minister, I was married to a minister for 21 years. I knew after a year of marriage that my marriage was over as he was cheating on me with a high school student. When I confronted him, the narcissistic abuse began and continued until he asked for a divorce after he got caught … Continue reading “DM, Why do they still support the cheater?”
Frustrated over your circumstances? Give thanks.
Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus. -I Thessalonians 5:18, NLT Ever notice how often we take our own health for granted until we get sick? Maybe it is only me who does this? But I doubt it. Focusing on what we do NOT have … Continue reading “Frustrated over your circumstances? Give thanks.”
PSA: Parents’ and In-Laws’ place is OUTSIDE of the marriage bed!
Some cheaters and their supporters have no shame. This seems especially true of the parents’ of some cheaters. They are willing to offer incredibly unhelpful and inappropriate advice to their daughter/son-in-law. Public Service Announcement: Dispensing unsolicited advice about the frequency (or “quality”) of a couple’s sex-life is a matter that no parent or in-law ought to … Continue reading “PSA: Parents’ and In-Laws’ place is OUTSIDE of the marriage bed!”
Violation of Boundaries and Advice
After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has. -Job 42:7, NIV Ever had that “friend” who got furious with you because you did not do whatever they told … Continue reading “Violation of Boundaries and Advice”
Pastors as spiritual advisers, NOT dictators!
11 No one can know a person’s thoughts except that person’s own spirit, and no one can know God’s thoughts except God’s own Spirit. 12 And we have received God’s Spirit (not the world’s spirit), so we can know the wonderful things God has freely given us. -1 Corinthians 2:11-12, NLT A good pastor understands he (or … Continue reading “Pastors as spiritual advisers, NOT dictators!”
Divorce Minister, Can you help?
Hi, I need help addressing my elders in my church regarding adultery. My husband had an affair with another member. I caught him, he was sorry. The pastor had the girl apologize and say she wouldn’t contact my husband again. It was very hard, but I forgave my husband, and we tried to work … Continue reading “Divorce Minister, Can you help?”