Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV “Yes, it happened. She cheated on you. And that’s right: you didn’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. Not at all.” You really want to help a faithful spouse. … Continue reading “Healing words for faithful spouses”
Make it stop!
My tears have been my food day and night, while people say to me all day long, “Where is your God?” -Psalm 42:3, NIV Just make it stop! I remember how this was the feeling I had early in my divorce process from my Cheater. It made me vulnerable to doing some soppy, chumpy things. Sometimes, … Continue reading “Make it stop!”
Unmet emotional needs excuse
“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.” -Cheater “I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!” -Cheater Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you. Maybe they will point to you spending too much time … Continue reading “Unmet emotional needs excuse”
Focus was the ring
“No man can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.” -Matthew 6:24, KJV “Hindsight is 20/20” as they say. Signs existed early in my first marriage indicating a mismatch of … Continue reading “Focus was the ring”
Dr. Brown Responses Underplays EAs
“…I did not have an affair, but we developed a very unhealthy and sinful soul tie.” -Dr. Brown’s email to Cantor on October 26, 2024 On February 20, 2025, BROWN was interviewed by Firefly ….. During this interview, BROWN admitted to what he called an “emotional affair” during the second half of 2001 with IS … Continue reading “Dr. Brown Responses Underplays EAs”
But the cost! Divorce scare tactics.
For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. -I Timothy 6:10, KJV A popular Christian curriculum for people going through divorce would regularly try to dissuade people from divorcing by pointing out the financial … Continue reading “But the cost! Divorce scare tactics.”
Healing requires reality acceptance
O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not! -Matthew 23:37, KJV Healing Requires Reality Acceptance We have to put down our “should’s” in order … Continue reading “Healing requires reality acceptance”
Crazy ride? No thanks.
To heal, we have to acknowledge the truth. The sad thing is our cheater may never actually do this. They might engage you in an endless battle over getting you to take responsibility for their abuse of you. That argument is one crazy ride. Refuse to take the bait. While helpful, you do not have … Continue reading “Crazy ride? No thanks.”
“Don’t die!” #truelove
This past weekend I competed in a bench press event in IL. I had to go alone since it was a busy weekend on the home front with a birthday party and prom for our kiddo and bonus kiddo. While Mrs. DM was fine with me competing this weekend, she was concerned about how I … Continue reading ““Don’t die!” #truelove”
Successful Hobby Day Yesterday!
Me under 235kgs/540lbs An important part of healing and de-stressing is finding a solid hobby. Mine is participating in equipped bench press competitions. For the past two years, I had been having trouble translating my training into scores in meets. I have “bombed out” of several equipped meets–i.e. failed to place a good lift. You … Continue reading “Successful Hobby Day Yesterday!”