So they are no longer two, but one flesh. -Matthew 19:6a, NIV The cheater approaching the affair as “self-care” or something “finally, for ME!” is self-deceived. You cannot sin against the marriage without also sinning against yourself. This is what the Judeo-Christian concept of marriage teaches us. The marriage partners are ONE. An affair certainly is … Continue reading “Self-Damage, NOT Self-Care”
Divorced and Blessed!
The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part. -Job 42:12, NIV The Church needs to hear stories from divorced faithful spouses who went on to live fulfilling lives after the ending of their marriages. These testimonies are needed for faithful spouses who are trapped in fear. The fear of the spiritually … Continue reading “Divorced and Blessed!”
We can…
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. -2 Timothy 1:7, KJV While adultery victims are not less than victims of their cheaters, they are also more. They are FAITHFUL SPOUSES! SURVIVORS. Just because we have been cheated upon does not mean … Continue reading “We can…”
Solves Nothing
But the man who commits adultery is an utter fool, for he destroys himself. -Proverbs 6:32, NLT So, your marriage has been full of conflict. -Maybe you argue over money use? -Maybe frequency of sex is an issue? -Maybe support keeping up the house is a sore spot? -Maybe having kids is a hard conversation? … Continue reading “Solves Nothing”
Possessive of Phone
Possessive of Phone I think this is one of the early warning signs of an affair. Namely, something is off when your spouse acts very glued to his or her phone. I mean in an unusual way. They do not want you to see something on that phone! Now, the classic cheater response to you … Continue reading “Possessive of Phone”
Your Victory Narrative
Instead of shame and dishonor, you will enjoy a double share of honor. -Isaiah 61:7a, NLT Why would you choose to accept the lie-filled narrative from your cheater as your own narrative? Choose your own victory narrative! Remember: You are not the rejected spouse. RATHER, you are the FAITHFUL SPOUSE! You are not the morally … Continue reading “Your Victory Narrative”
Moment of slippage
Did you ever have your Cheater give you a moment of unintentional honesty? I call it a moment, because they did not follow that brief glimpse into reality with a full confession. However, for a moment, you caught a glimpse of what was or is really happening with them. Maybe they confessed to doing something … Continue reading “Moment of slippage”
Forbidden Fruit Fantasy
And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.” -Genesis 2:16-17, NIV I suspect many of our cheaters were addicted to the “high” … Continue reading “Forbidden Fruit Fantasy”
Not about you!
21 “For from within, out of a person’s heart, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, 22 adultery, greed, wickedness, deceit, lustful desires, envy, slander, pride, and foolishness. 23 All these vile things come from within; they are what defile you.” -Mark 7:21-23, NLT The cheating is NOT about you! This is what this Scripture reveals. We–faithful spouses–are not … Continue reading “Not about you!”
Older Maybe NOT Wiser Pastor
Let them alone: they be blind leaders of the blind. And if the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch. -Matthew 15:14, KJV I wish I could say an older pastor will be more discerning and wiser than a younger pastor on matters of adultery and divorce. But that would be a … Continue reading “Older Maybe NOT Wiser Pastor”