I woke up from a nightmare this morning. It was a nightmare involving a divorce from Mrs. DM. In the nightmare, she had filed on me, and did not give me a reason why she did so. It was a terrifying dream for me. Of course, it was all a demonic lie to torment me. … Continue reading “Disturbing dream”
Category: Cheating
Emotional healing takes great time.
Probably the hardest part of healing from a divorce from a cheater are the lingering emotional wounds from that marriage. You have to find a way to ground yourself in reality. The truth is what will set you free from the cheater’s lies about you and your marriage. In other words, this reality is a … Continue reading “Emotional healing takes great time.”
On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce
“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT What astounds me with pastors and Christian marriage counselors who deal with marital infidelity situations is how too many treat cheating as incidental to a marriage ending in … Continue reading “On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce”
Yep, some actually are crazy!
But a man who commits adultery has no sense…. -Proverbs 6:32a, NIV A common word of advice in the dating world is not to date a divorced individual who describes their ex as “crazy.”* Maybe you have heard this one? Such bad-mouthing of an ex is treated as a major red flag. The idea is that … Continue reading “Yep, some actually are crazy!”
Insist on seeing the change!
Prove by the way you live that you have repented of your sins and turned to God. -Matthew 3:8, NLT When dealing with a cheater, the proper biblical approach is NOT to even consider restoring the marriage without obvious repentance. You need to look at the cheater’s actions: Are they the sort of actions that … Continue reading “Insist on seeing the change!”
Season for divorce, too?
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT Do we really believe this Bible verse? If we do, I suggest “everything” includes a time for divorce. It may not be the best of all options–just as making war is not better than peace–yet like war, it … Continue reading “Season for divorce, too?”
Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!
Christian leaders seem to worry that allowing any divorce is to open the flood gates to every divorce. The idea is permitting divorce necessarily means taking a disposable stance towards the covenant of marriage. This is just not so. God does not take marriage lightly, and yet He is described in the Bible as divorcing Israel: And I saw, … Continue reading “Marriage as disposable? Ask the cheater!”
PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad. -2 Corinthians 5:10, KJV Repenting of sins committed against us makes no sense! Yet this is the standard counsel given to … Continue reading “PSA: Not Your Mess To Fix!”
A good distraction
When I was heading for my divorce and then recovering from it, I had some wonderful friends who helped distract me from the pain. It was a gift. I hope you have a true friend or two who does that for you as well. Sometimes, we need a break from the grief work. That is … Continue reading “A good distraction”
Wanting to revisit
Cheaters are often in their own fantasy worlds. They might think they get to dictate the narrative and reality; however, they find that they do not truly have that power. This frustrates and angers them. So, watch out when you set that boundary. Some might want to revisit your relationship and talk about “what went … Continue reading “Wanting to revisit”