Category: Emotional Affair

Cheater-speak: “I’m a good Christian.”

 Anyone who continues to live in him will not sin. But anyone who keeps on sinning does not know him or understand who he is. -I John 3:6, NLT “I’m a good Christian,” declares deceived Cheater. Some might make this statement to seek validation from you or others. They are saying it as a test … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “I’m a good Christian.””

Cheater-Speak: “I feel like God is calling me to….”

2 And he said, “Take now thy son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of.” Genesis 22:2, KJV Cheaters are engaging in self-deception when they decide God is calling … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I feel like God is calling me to….””

Pro-Tip: Do not engage with “deserving it” fools

A sage trying to work things out with a fool     gets only scorn and sarcasm for his trouble. -Proverbs 29:9, THE MESSAGE Arguing Over Why You “Deserved It” This is a wasted argument. It is like talking with someone with your face still bleeding and them asking you what you did to deserve having your … Continue reading “Pro-Tip: Do not engage with “deserving it” fools”

“Exit Affair” Minimizing Label

“You shall not commit adultery.” -Exodus 20:14, NKJV Does it make it any less sinful to cheat if the marriage is troubled? The correct answer to this is “No.” Adultery is adultery. Sin is sin. Circumstances around the sin do not matter as far as determining if the behavior is sin or not. I see … Continue reading ““Exit Affair” Minimizing Label”

“Talking about that triggers my toxic shame.”

“Talking about that triggers my toxic shame. So, let’s talk about something else,” says Cheater. Anguish over the awful things they did may very well be real. And they need to go through it to heal the matter, NOT avoid it. Honestly, Cheaters talking about toxic shame are often using it as excuse to avoid … Continue reading ““Talking about that triggers my toxic shame.””

Cheaters Playing “The Martyr”

“Let’s separate. I think that would be best for us both to heal,” says Cheater. Some cheaters will attempt to cloak their sins in robes of nobility. They will profess mutual benefit while using such as a cover to betray they spouse. That is just how some cheaters “roll.” They play the long-suffering martyr. However, … Continue reading “Cheaters Playing “The Martyr””

“You MUST have known!”

“You MUST have known about her cheating,” says anxious outsider. “No way you didn’t have an idea that she was cheating,” says another anxious outsider. Whether or not you had suspicions (or even knew of the cheating) is not the same as giving them permission to cheat. Let’s be honest: Anxious people saying such things … Continue reading ““You MUST have known!””

Wait to date

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven…. -Ecclesiastes 3:1, KJV So, you decided to divorce your cheater. However, you are still married. Please do not date during this limbo period. You will have plenty of time to do this after the divorce is finalized. This is a good … Continue reading “Wait to date”

Worried About Forever Holding It Over Their Heads

“I’m concerned that you will hold this [affair] over my head forever if I stay,” Cheater declares. A cheater who makes such a statement is still more concerned about themselves than the trauma they inflicted on their spouse by cheating. The statement really is revealing. Such a cheater still believes it is about their wishes … Continue reading “Worried About Forever Holding It Over Their Heads”