Anger towards “supporting characters”

God is an honest judge. He is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NLT Oddly enough, my anger was often directed to other bad actors in my divorce instead of the prime character–my (now) ex-wife. Certainly, I had good reason to feel angry towards those others. It was actually healthy to feel this … Continue reading “Anger towards “supporting characters””

If it is about power over…

 But Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers in this world lord it over their people, and officials flaunt their authority over those under them.” -Matthew 20:25, NLT “You will just keep that [her cheating] over her head forever [if she stayed married to you].” -Cheater apologist Some people view all relationships … Continue reading “If it is about power over…”

Learning to like oneself.

How could I have missed that?! I do not know if you can relate to asking this question of yourself. However, I think the fractured relationship with oneself is a relationship almost always needing attention. Part of the devastation of discovering a cheating spouse is discovering the deception was ongoing for a long period of time, … Continue reading “Learning to like oneself.”

Entrust Your Situation To God

He did not retaliate when he was insulted,     nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God,     who always judges fairly. -I Peter 2:23, NLT The secret to dealing with injustice is remembering a higher court exists and we know its Judge is good. Faith in this Judge allows … Continue reading “Entrust Your Situation To God”

“Have you rebuked her?”

“Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.” -Luke 17:3, NKJV “Did you rebuke her?” This question never came up in my ecclesiastical trial to retain my ministerial credentials.* They were quick to ask me about “forgiveness,” yet they did not ask this important question as far as … Continue reading ““Have you rebuked her?””

NOT “friends” with ex and that is fine

How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14b, NLT Some Christians expect faithful spouses to remain “friends” with their cheating ex-partner following divorce. This is insane! The expectation is wound up in a twisted and perverted understanding of what forgiveness demands in this situation. Guess what? … Continue reading “NOT “friends” with ex and that is fine”

“Forgiveness” Rather Than Repentance “Concerned” People

…and if you see him going the wrong direction, cry out and correct him. If there is true repentance on his part, forgive him. -Luke 17:3, TPT I wonder if you have experienced versions of these questions or statements. They usually come from well-meaning (but emotionally and biblically tone-deaf) Christians: “So, have you forgiven her?” … Continue reading ““Forgiveness” Rather Than Repentance “Concerned” People”