And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two. -Matthew 5:41, NKJV In the same way, on the outside you appear to people as righteous but on the inside you are full of hypocrisy and wickedness. -Matthew 23:28, NIV When dealing with a “Christian” cheater, another level of complexity is placed on Christians … Continue reading “Cheater: Pharisee or Enemy?”
Category: Forgiveness
Cheaters Remarrying
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Does God permit Cheaters to remarry after divorcing their faithful partner? The simple answer is “No.” Yet Cheaters DO remarry, which should not surprise us. They already demonstrated their … Continue reading “Cheaters Remarrying”
Not Cheap!
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me. So what’s your problem?!” -Cheater Does … Continue reading “Not Cheap!”
Not forgiven
“And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity.” -Matthew 7:23, KJV While I believe God makes forgiveness available to all (John 3:16, 2 Cor 5:14, etc), I do not believe all are forgiven. This verse from the Sermon on the Mount makes that much clear. … Continue reading “Not forgiven”
Rebuilding Trust
Rebuilding trust WITH YOURSELF! If you are at all like I was, it was particularly disorienting making all the awful discoveries knowing the infidelity had been going on for some time. While it obliterated trust with one’s Cheater, it also undermined one’s own trust in self. How could I have missed this for so long? … Continue reading “Rebuilding Trust”
I don’t get it.
I don’t get faithful spouses wanting to be friends with their Cheaters. Sure, there’s pressure to do this “for the kids” if kids are involved. Some may feel pressure from outsiders to do this to not burden them with the ugliness that is reality. It makes sense for Cheaters to want this–i.e. to be “friends.” … Continue reading “I don’t get it.”
About power
25 Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. 26 Not so with you.” -Matthew 20:25-26a, NIV Cheaters lie to hold power over faithful spouses. “Knowledge is power” as the saying goes. This means Cheaters are careful to control who has … Continue reading “About power”
No forgiveness without wrongs acknowledged
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” -I John 1:9, KJV What good is forgiveness to someone who does not think he or she did anything wrong? It is worthless. They are not in bondage to a conscience warning them … Continue reading “No forgiveness without wrongs acknowledged”
Forgiveness as act of trust
Trusting God with our hurts is hard. Forgiveness is about doing just that, though. It is allowing God be God in our situation. But forgiving our cheater is nearly impossible if we believe we care more about justice than God. Justice matters to God. He did not just give sin a pass. It isn’t cheap … Continue reading “Forgiveness as act of trust”
Called to ministry of reconciliation. To Cheaters, too?
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…. – 2 Corinthians 5:18, NIV Do we not all have the ministry of reconciliation as followers of Christ? Does that include reconciling with Cheaters? The obvious answer to the first question is “Yes, we are called … Continue reading “Called to ministry of reconciliation. To Cheaters, too?”