An overseer, then, must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, temperate, prudent, respectable, hospitable, able to teach…. -I Timothy 3:2, NASB Some cheaters have absolutely no shame. They get caught and retroactively try to make it look like it was and is okay. Maybe they suggest an open marriage? Maybe they suggest a … Continue reading “No, polygamy is not an option either!”
Category: Sin
It takes two… really?!
Random Christian: Sure, she cheated on you. But you know, it takes two to tango. DM: That only applies if you have two willing and able dance partners. She clearly is not willing and possibly not even able to “tango” with me. The “It takes two to tango” line is a subtle blame-shift upon faithful … Continue reading “It takes two… really?!”
They do not get to decide for you…
Your cheater does not get to decide for you… …whether their cheating is a big deal (or deal breaker) for you. That is YOURS to decide. Now, I understand many a cheater will TRY to decide this for you. They will tell you all sort of lies about how the cheating is merely a symptom. … Continue reading “They do not get to decide for you…”
Manipulators with mad skills are cheaters
Test all things; hold fast what is good. -I Thessalonians 5:21, NKJV A master manipulator knows how to take a potential weakness and work it into a strength. They know how to leverage a situation. Cheaters are master manipulators, IMO. The speed at which a cheater can turn a confession of infidelity into a discussion … Continue reading “Manipulators with mad skills are cheaters”
Damaged but NOT Damaged Goods!
We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. -2 Corinthians 4:8-9, NIV An amazing thing about Christianity is how God takes us as damaged creatures and transforms us into beautiful vessels for His glory. It isn’t disqualifying to have had a rough experience in … Continue reading “Damaged but NOT Damaged Goods!”
Element of willful, repeated sin
26 If we deliberately keep on sinning after we have received the knowledge of the truth, no sacrifice for sins is left, 27 but only a fearful expectation of judgment and of raging fire that will consume the enemies of God. -Hebrews 10:26-27, NIV The other day I was listening to a podcast, and a point the speakers made about the … Continue reading “Element of willful, repeated sin”
Emotional healing takes great time.
Probably the hardest part of healing from a divorce from a cheater are the lingering emotional wounds from that marriage. You have to find a way to ground yourself in reality. The truth is what will set you free from the cheater’s lies about you and your marriage. In other words, this reality is a … Continue reading “Emotional healing takes great time.”
On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce
“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT What astounds me with pastors and Christian marriage counselors who deal with marital infidelity situations is how too many treat cheating as incidental to a marriage ending in … Continue reading “On treating adultery as side issue re:divorce”
Insist on seeing the change!
Prove by the way you live that you have repented of your sins and turned to God. -Matthew 3:8, NLT When dealing with a cheater, the proper biblical approach is NOT to even consider restoring the marriage without obvious repentance. You need to look at the cheater’s actions: Are they the sort of actions that … Continue reading “Insist on seeing the change!”
Season for divorce, too?
For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. – Ecclesiastes 3:1, NLT Do we really believe this Bible verse? If we do, I suggest “everything” includes a time for divorce. It may not be the best of all options–just as making war is not better than peace–yet like war, it … Continue reading “Season for divorce, too?”