When the infidelity betrayal is fresh, a temptation exists to write off an entire gender. I think this is very common for faithful spouses. I think it is part of the grief process. We feel vulnerable and betrayed. The trauma of it all makes us want to avoid putting ourselves in a place where … Continue reading “That phase”
Author: Divorce Minister
Sucker punch of grief
His family all tried to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. “I will go to my grave mourning for my son,” he would say, and then he would weep. -Genesis 37:35, NLT Out of nowhere. That is how grief works sometimes. It reminds us of the loss even when we thought we were … Continue reading “Sucker punch of grief”
Do not let them “get” to you!
If you live without restraint and are unable to control your temper, you’re as helpless as a city with broken-down defenses, open to attack. -Proverbs 25:28, TPT Boy, this is a hard one to learn. Cheaters seemed skilled at needling their partner just where they are the most vulnerable. It might be over their “manhood” … Continue reading “Do not let them “get” to you!”
Pastors, adultery needs to be condemned publicly!
“From the least to the greatest, all are greedy for gain; prophets and priests alike, all practice deceit. They dress the wound of my people as though it were not serious. ‘Peace, peace,’ they say, when there is no peace. Are they ashamed of their detestable conduct? No, they have no shame at all; they … Continue reading “Pastors, adultery needs to be condemned publicly!”
Godly forgiveness is NOT cheap forgiveness
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me. So what’s your problem?!” -Cheater Does … Continue reading “Godly forgiveness is NOT cheap forgiveness”
Any pastor teaching empathy as sinful is waving a major red flag!
The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth. -John 1:14, NIV Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. -Romans 12:15, KJV Recently, empathy has encountered push back in … Continue reading “Any pastor teaching empathy as sinful is waving a major red flag!”
Signs of a really repentant person per Author Chuck Swindoll
“…you won’t be defensive or angry or proud or bitter. A contrite heart makes no demands and has no expectations. Broken and humble people are simply grateful to be alive.” -Charles Swindoll, A Man of Passion and Destiny: David, Nashville, TN: Thomas Nelson, 1997, pp207. The question about how to tell if a cheater is … Continue reading “Signs of a really repentant person per Author Chuck Swindoll”
A song that helps transport me to God’s throne room
When I was in the pit of adultery discovery and the divorce discard, I was attending a church that regularly played a song with true spiritual power. It is a song that lifted and lifts my eyes from my circumstances and places them on God who is holy and perfect. The song is a version … Continue reading “A song that helps transport me to God’s throne room”
A resource on narcissists by Dr. Les Carter
One of the biggest things I learned through my divorce was how we walk in a world with people who lack empathy on a pathological level. They lie without remorse. Psychology labels them with a variety of labels (I am not a psychologist). Today, I just want to pass along a resource for those who … Continue reading “A resource on narcissists by Dr. Les Carter”
Cheater, you are the aggressor, not victim, here!
Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite them with a prostitute? Never! -I Corinthians 6:15, NIV Cheater, you are the aggressor, not the victim, here! For whatever reasons, people are often taken in by the pity story a caught cheater spins … Continue reading “Cheater, you are the aggressor, not victim, here!”