When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown. When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you. -Isaiah 43:2, NLT What makes me so devoted to following Jesus? Like numerous … Continue reading “Friendship with God forged through fire”
Cheater-Speak: “I can’t keep pretending…”
“I can’t keep pretending everything is fine,” says Cheater. What this really means is the Cheater is tired of hiding their contempt for the faithful spouse. They are declaring it is too much. So, they will now display their contempt openly. The cheater has no real problem with pretending as long as it advantages them. They … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I can’t keep pretending…””
Privilege says, “Move on!”
“You need to move on,” says the Privileged. When something as traumatic as a surviving the adultery and divorce from a cheater happens, you are forever marked. Over time, I have found the scars fade. However, they will always be there. People pushing for one to “move on” are pushing denial of these scars. It … Continue reading “Privilege says, “Move on!””
Link to Sermon: Bildad or Barnabas?
Yesterday, I was the pulpit supply at a local church I call home, Destiny Church Rochester (MN). The theme of my sermon was how to be an effective encourager. I drew on passages from Job and Acts touching on difficult subjects of grief and forgiveness along the way. A key quote from my sermon: An … Continue reading “Link to Sermon: Bildad or Barnabas?”
Blog Pause: DM at a Summit
I am writing from a room in Redding, California. This year I have the opportunity for a time of spiritual refreshment and connection at the Bethel Leaders Summit. Since I am at this conference for refreshment, I am taking a break from blogging (or at least, not committing to my daily postings). Thank you for … Continue reading “Blog Pause: DM at a Summit”
“Starter Marriage” Nonsense
And he said, “‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’” -Matthew 19:5, NLT When my first marriage was falling apart, I remember someone bringing up the idea of “starter marriages.” The idea is one where the first marriage is simply … Continue reading ““Starter Marriage” Nonsense”
Impulsive divorce? Hardly.
And I saw, when for all the causes whereby backsliding Israel committed adultery I had put her away, and given her a bill of divorce…. -Jeremiah 3:8a, KJV What I find curious in cases with adultery is how the Christian community is so quick to press against the faithful spouse choosing divorce as if this … Continue reading “Impulsive divorce? Hardly.”
“What about their soul?”
“What about their soul? You could win them back by how you respond,” says well-meaning, naive Christian. This burden is unfair. There is enough pressure on faithful spouses. They don’t need more spiritual shaming. Faithful spouses are Jesus. They do not save souls. Only Jesus can do this. It is spiritually unhealthy to suggest otherwise. Just … Continue reading ““What about their soul?””
Discern by their fruit
A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. …Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions. -Matthew 7:17, 20, NLT When talking about love, I would recommend to look at actions and not just words. Cheaters will say all … Continue reading “Discern by their fruit”
Have to choose!
After discovering an inappropriate relationship, a strong indicator over the repentant nature of the cheater is how they handle that relationship going forward. They must choose: Is their marriage more important than this fantasy-fling or is this illicit relationship more important to them? A cheater who stays “friends” with their affair partner is telling faithful … Continue reading “Have to choose!”