Cheaters often are very insistent about controlling the narrative on what happened to end the marriage. Some think that they are entitled to avoid the natural consequences that come with doing something very, very bad. You know, the sort of consequences that people tend to trust and esteem you less knowing how you treacherously betrayed your (former) … Continue reading “Narrative control as abuse”
Cheaters are master manipulators.
Test all things; hold fast what is good. -I Thessalonians 5:21, NKJV A master manipulator knows how to take a potential weakness and work it into a strength. They know how to leverage a situation. Cheaters are master manipulators, IMO. The speed at which a cheater can turn a confession of infidelity into a discussion … Continue reading “Cheaters are master manipulators.”
Seven years, today.
Another anniversary. Today marks the seventh anniversary of my divorce becoming final. I have now been divorced from longer than I was married to my first wife. I still have memories, yet it feels like a lifetime away. The hardest memories are the fond ones as they remind me of what was lost. Yet, I … Continue reading “Seven years, today.”
A Spiritual Principle: Hope comes as a baby
“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.” – Luke 2:11-12, NIV When Jesus–God’s son–was born, he was not born into this world as … Continue reading “A Spiritual Principle: Hope comes as a baby”
Still a shock.
“And all his sons and all his daughters rose up to comfort him; but he refused to be comforted….” -Genesis 37:35, KJV In two days, it will have been seven years since my divorce was officially made final. Hard to believe it has been that long. God has transformed my life since that sad day; … Continue reading “Still a shock.”
Demonic Dreams
I woke up from a nightmare this morning. It was a nightmare involving a divorce from Mrs. DM. In the nightmare, she had filed on me, and did not give me a reason why she did so. It was a terrifying dream for me. Of course, it was all a demonic lie to torment me. … Continue reading “Demonic Dreams”
Emotional wounds are the longest to heal.
Probably the hardest part of healing from a divorce from a cheater are the lingering emotional wounds from that marriage. You have to find a way to ground yourself in reality. This reality is a reality NOT defined by the cheater or her people. It is reality, in other words. That is hard to do when you … Continue reading “Emotional wounds are the longest to heal.”
On treating cheating as an unimportant detail regarding the divorce.
“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT What astounds me with pastors and Christian marriage counselors who deal with marital infidelity situations is how too many treat cheating as incidental to a marriage ending in … Continue reading “On treating cheating as an unimportant detail regarding the divorce.”
But some truly ARE crazy!
But a man who commits adultery has no sense…. -Proverbs 6:32a, NIV A common word of advice in the dating world is not to date a divorced individual who describes their ex as “crazy.”* Maybe you have heard this one? Such bad-mouthing of an ex is treated as a major red flag. The idea is that … Continue reading “But some truly ARE crazy!”
God knows, and God is always faithful!
And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, “The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness….” -Exodus 34:6, NIV When I was going through my divorce from my cheater, the future looked extremely bleak on the employment front for me. I was SOOO close to giving up on … Continue reading “God knows, and God is always faithful!”