As a dog returns to its vomit,
so a fool repeats his foolishness.-Proverbs 26:11, NLT
I was watching a clip from a counselor lately on cheating and reconciliation. Sven Erlandson of Badass Counseling was the person I was specifically watching.
He made this great point about cheaters whining about how long faithful spouses are taking to “forgive” and “put it in the past.”
The cheater doing this is demonstrating that they have not changed and the base-level problem–i.e. their selfishness–that led to their cheating is still there. They are making it about their comfort and their timetable. It is about how it serves them and makes them feel.
To put this in spiritual language, such a cheater is unrepentant. They are not changing courses from their prideful and selfishness that led them into the sin of adultery.
My thought on such situations is that a divorce is actually probably the wisest course of action here. You cannot make a person change. They are telling you by their words and actions that they will choose and continue to choose themselves over you and the marriage.
God does not have any shame for you in divorcing such an unrepentant cheater (see Mt. 1:19, 19:9, etc).
