“Look at all the birds—do you think they worry about their existence? They don’t plant or reap or store up food, yet your heavenly Father provides them each with food. Aren’t you much more valuable to your Father than they?” -Matthew 6:26a, TPT Financial worry was a really close companion during the end of … Continue reading “Lessons from the birds”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Marriage day vows are a solemn promise to choose your spouse
‘”6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one split apart what God has joined together.’” -Matthew 19:6, NLT Today, I was at a conference where the speaker, Steve Backlund, said something about marriage and making decisions. He stated that the marriage vows really say, “I’m going to keep choosing you.” I totally … Continue reading “Marriage day vows are a solemn promise to choose your spouse”
Really BAD idea!
“Why don’t you both take a break from each other?” -Clueless Counselor This is one of the dumbest pieces of advice given to a couple dealing with infidelity. The problems of an infidelity ravaged marriage are not solved by creating more distance and less accountability for the cheater. Both are the last things needed, actually. A break … Continue reading “Really BAD idea!”
My feelings regarding the Other Man
Keep to a path far from her [adulteress], do not go near the door of her house, lest you lose your honor to others and your dignity to one who is cruel, lest strangers feast on your wealth and your toil enrich the house of another. -Proverbs 8-10, NIV How do I feel about the affair … Continue reading “My feelings regarding the Other Man”
Their sins are NOT in anyway your fault!
For we must all stand before Christ to be judged. We will each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in this earthly body. – 2 Corinthians 5:10, NLT You are NOT responsible for your Cheater’s sins. Period. If you are like me, you will encounter all sort of people … Continue reading “Their sins are NOT in anyway your fault!”
Adultery damages more than the faithful partner
Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words. -Job 2:13, NIV Just as the wedding day is a family event, the adultery discovery and divorce are felt by the same family as … Continue reading “Adultery damages more than the faithful partner”
“A cry for help” affair excuse nonsense
“Don’t you see it [the cheating] was a cry for help?! If only you had ____ (fill in favorite cheater grievance with faithful spouse) more, then I wouldn’t have cheated.” -Unfaithful spouse Using the “Cry for help” excuse for an affair–either emotional or physical–is manipulation pure and simple. The cheater is using this label to … Continue reading ““A cry for help” affair excuse nonsense”
Ready
For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, And abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You. -Psalm 86:5, NKJV “God is ready to forgive.” -Diane Langberg, Ph.D. I was on an online event today where Dr. Diane Langberg spoke. She brought this point up about forgiveness as a point about God’s forgiveness. The idea … Continue reading “Ready”
Cheater-Speak: “It’s not like I was trying to cheat on you.”
“It’s not like I was trying to cheat on you. It just sort of happened.” -Cheater A cheater speaking like this is an unrepentant cheater. How do I know? Well, repentance starts with the honesty of owning one’s own choices and behavior. The cheater speaking like this is not being honest on those fronts. To this … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “It’s not like I was trying to cheat on you.””
Denigrating sharing by cheaters
“She was being unfair. Jane knew just what a good soldier her husband was, but a woman who has deserted her man and stolen his fortune soon learns to denigrate his memory as a justification for her actions.” -Bernarnd Cornwell, Waterloo (#11) (Sharpe Book 20), New York, New York: Penguin Books, 1987, pp65. The above … Continue reading “Denigrating sharing by cheaters”